People 
| When The Kingdom Melody Went Off-Key |
| Written by Frank Kavelin |
| Monday, 10 August 2009 15:25 |
I am Frank Kavelin. My wife Barbara and I were recently disfellowshipped for apostasy. Long before we became inactive, I was mentioned in one topic and was the subject of another topic on the Discussion Board JWN. I was the elder who was quoted in the Los Angeles Times defending an article that appeared in the 1987 Watchtower dealing with doctor/patient privacy issues. http://www.jehovahs-witness.net/watchtower/beliefs/107603/1/A-Time-to-Speak-When-with-scans. I am also the brother who was seriously injured in the Santa Monica Farmers Market tragedy of 2002. Jehovah's Witness BeginningsMy parents became Witnesses in the early 1950s. My father, Al Kavelin, who had been a successful bandleader in the 1930s and 40s, was, by the 1950s, struggling to support his family. I have three sisters, so there were six of us altogether. One day, while my father was networking in Hollywood, he ran in to Henry Russell who had formerly headed up the music department at NBC, West Coast. My father asked Henry why he was no longer at NBC and Henry replied that he had a better job. It was hard to imagine that there could be a better job than the one Henry had, so my father’s curiosity moved him to inquire further. Henry’s answer was, “I’m working for Jehovah.” Although my father had a sense of where the conversation was going, he asked, “Who is Jehovah?” Henry knew my father was the son of a rabbi, and so chastised him for asking such a question. At this point, my father wanted to end the conversation and said, “We’ll have to talk about it some time.” Henry replied, “Alright, when?” Outmaneuvered, my father invited Henry for dinner the following Wednesday evening. Henry arrived at about 6:00 p.m., and after a marathon debate, left at approximately 6:00 a.m. the next morning. These all-night sessions continued for the better part of two years. Based on these discussions and my father’s independent research, he became convinced that what Henry was sharing was The Truth. My father was baptized, and, close to a year later, so was my mother. News that a former bandleader and his wife who had formerly been a fashion model had become Witnesses spread in the Witness community. Bonnie Boyd Heath included my parents in her list of “Celebrity” Witnesses". Over the years, my parents’ generosity and hospitality earned them many Witness friends including a good number of the leadership, most especially Ted and Melita Jaracz. My father served as an elder for many years. He was quite visible in the Witness community because he conducted the orchestra at the large district conventions in Los Angeles. (Remember how much more of an event those occasions were before the Jaraczic “streamlining”?) My mother survived him by 23 years and was greatly loved and respected.
My BackgroundI was one year old at the time of my father’s conversion. Although my three older sisters were required to attend the meetings, they never accepted the teachings. I would describe our family as closer than most, even though we were now divided religiously. I was baptized at the age of eight. My two best friends, both of whom were slightly younger, were baptized around the same time. I was genuinely interested in the Bible and tended to be conscientious when preparing talks for the Ministry School. I was also very involved in music, both playing and composing. At age 16, I began dating Barbara, a girl in my congregation who had begun attending meetings when her mother decided to return to the congregation after years of inactivity. We weren’t scrutinized much other than the pleadings of my parents to end the relationship because we were too young to date. They were right, of course, but the forces of nature were at work. We weren’t able to stay apart. We dated off and on, and although I dated others, and so did she, I knew that I would marry her some day. I graduated high school in 1969 during the Viet Nam war. The default for most of us after high school was to pioneer. College wasn’t even considered in our household. My father was convinced that 1975 was all the Organization said it was. I worked hard at pioneering, even making some converts, some of whom are still active today. I was living with my parents and worked in music, performing relatively mundane tasks for Witness composers and producers who were established in the music business prior to becoming Witnesses. By the time I was 22, Barbara and I wanted to get married. Since my income from music was hit and miss and since I was still pioneering, I took up the other default--janitorial work. We were married in 1973. By this time, my father was semi-retired, having invested in the construction of a resort in Jamaica. His foray into the travel business afforded him deep discounts on air travel and hotels. Some brothers approached him with the request that he make travel arrangements for a group that wanted to attend a district convention in Hawaii. The success of this venture spawned other group junkets to Brooklyn Bethel and other destinations. Thus began Kavelin Tours, Inc. I was grateful to give up my stint as a janitor to assist my father in the travel business. It was a very happy time for Barbara and me, as all of our activities centered on the congregation, traveling with groups of Witnesses to many exciting destinations, making contacts at Bethel and so forth. Barbara auxiliary pioneered with me on occasion and we rarely had any financial worries. Then came, and went, 1975. Not surprisingly our services as tour operators were less and less called upon as the friends were in the process of regrouping and readjusting their thinking regarding day-to-day survival, post-1975. Fortunately, I was able to reconnect with my Witness contacts in the music business and was able to eke out a living and provide for my growing family. Our daughter, Sara, was born in 1977 and our son, Peter, came along in 1981. My father died in 1982. Fortunately, my mother was able to live quite well on my father’s music royalties and Social Security for the remainder of her life. She enjoyed much love and support from the congregation as well as the love and support of all of her children. My sisters and I were at her bedside when she died in 2005 at the age of 91. By the 1990s it became necessary for me to seek work outside of music. Barbara, who had to help support our family in the mid-1980s, was working as a legal secretary and suggested I consider doing the same. Just as she was able to obtain work with no prior experience, I found that I could too. A medium-sized firm hired me in 1992. In 1997, we moved from the Beverly Hills Congregation to the Bay Congregation in Santa Monica, California. In 2001, I moved to a very large international law firm in Santa Monica where I work to this day.
Writing Music For The Watchtower SocietyIn the late 1970s, my father and I were asked to submit songs for a new songbook that was being prepared. I submitted four songs including music and lyrics and my father submitted one song, music only. Two of my songs were accepted along with my father’s song. Karl Klein supervised the project, assisted by Vern Duncombe. My lyrics were largely replaced and the music was adjusted to accommodate the new lyrics. These two songs came out the other end as Song 191, “Make the Truth Your Own” and Song 210, “Make Sure of the More Important Things”. The melody that my father submitted was actually composed by him during the Second World War as a jingle advertising war bonds. Lyrics were added and the result was Song 19, “Happy All Day Long”. My father died before knowing that his song had been accepted and published in the new songbook. In 1986, I was invited to join the staff of writers that arranged the Kingdom Melodies series of recordings. Over the next 20 years, I traveled back to Bethel, usually twice a year, to work on Kingdom Melodies, dramas, special material for the Gilead graduations and then later, videos. It was a rich experience. Ironically, during this time I built friendships with people who today wouldn’t meet my eyes if we passed on the street. Some of the staff writers were and are professional musicians and no one has been more critical of the songbook than these writers. The 1982 songbook was made up of music composed, for the most part, by amateur Witness musicians from around the world, edited by a professional who was past his prime, under the supervision of a Governing Body member, an amateur musician himself, who had a random sense of taste in music. An elderly brother who served in one of the South American branch offices, wrote and edited the lyrics. The result was a collection of organizational instructions steeped in the sterile language of the New World Translation, set to very poor music. Even professional singers would have great difficulty singing most of these songs. When I withdrew my services in 2007, we were working on the new songbook that was announced at the 2009 District Convention. Although I have not seen the finished product, it will be a definite improvement owing to a more concentrated pool of talent, better supervision and the elimination of a large portion of the 1982 songbook.
A New Path
Even though I didn’t have the title of “Elder,” I was still active in my work at Bethel and the congregation used me as much as possible. When the congregation recommended that I once again serve as an elder, one elder raised the objection that that Barbara was a low-hour publisher. There were legitimate reasons for her status. By this time, Barbara’s respect for the organization had eroded significantly. This incident moved her to read her Bible with greater intensity to see how scriptural all of this was. Thus began a process of discovery for her. Her big epiphany was the understanding that Jesus’ teaching regarding the faithful and discreet slave was a parable, not a prophecy, and that the leadership has arrogantly asserted that they are the fulfillment of that teaching. At the same time it was evident that they have blasphemously assumed the role of co-mediator with Jesus by asserting that salvation for the rank and file is not possible apart from them. I loved study and research, and the organization’s teachings held together for me until 1995. When the Governing Body rendered Jesus’ words regarding the generation that will not pass away until all these things occur meaningless in order to retain the 1914 chronology, I saw them regard their own tradition as more important than the clear words of Jesus. Over the next ten years I saw the effects on the leadership of having a less defined expectation of when the end would come while trying to sustain a sense of urgency within the membership. The increasing emphasis on the “faithful slave” and its governing body and the increasing demands that we trust and obey them replaced motivation based on the content of their teachings. This, I believe, was due to the Governing Body’s losing a measure of confidence in its own teachings and discerning the need to be more assertive in demanding loyalty and obedience. The emphasis on increased activity for its own sake replaced emphasis on that which properly motivates such activity. Over time, Barbara and I lost any joy we had in connection with the congregation. Our joy returned somewhat when we simply read the Bible. Our prior Bible reading had always been through the subjective lens of the organization’s teachings. A more objective reading provided an understanding of the marvels of God’s grace, as opposed to the limiting, condescending and guilt inducing “underserved kindness” of the New World Translation. It became more evident that, in the first century, it was the power of the holy spirit acting on individuals that made possible the spread of the good news about Jesus, not some central authority in Jerusalem. The importance of faith in Christ and his role as the singular mediator between God and man stood out as never before. Once we had sufficient indication from the Scriptures that there might be another way of understanding them, we made a thorough investigation of our religion, including its history and development. By 2007 we could no longer in good conscience support the Organization. We would have probably come to this realization earlier had my mother not lived as long as she did. She was emotionally dependant on me, mainly because I was the only one of her children who had embraced her religion. I resigned from my congregation responsibilities and withdrew my participation in the Society’s music projects. Our leaving was abrupt, not gradual. Our closest friends shunned us from the start as we had shared with them some of our reasons for leaving.
Closing The BookThe first year after leaving the congregation was harder on Barbara than on me. She is a social person who enjoys entertaining friends at our home. Naturally, it hurt us both to lose lifelong friends and realize the conditional nature of those friendships. After two years of inactivity, I received an official call from a long-time friend inviting us to a judicial committee meeting. I was told that there was sufficient evidence that my teachings provided basis for judicial action. Our efforts to explain ourselves and even defend ourselves to our close friends had been construed as “teaching”. In reality, we never sought to “draw away” others from the Organization. When asked if I wanted to write a letter of disassociation, I declined. Barbara and I had previously decided that writing a disassociation letter was playing by their rules. This was their initiative and I wanted them to finish what they had started rather than to finish it for them. I declined, on behalf of both of us, the invitation to attend the judicial meeting. I knew, and thus stated, that the judicial committee would do as it is told. A few days later I was informed that we had been disfellowshipped for apostasy. I indicated that we would not appeal the decision. During the appeal period of one week we sent the following letter to approximately 22 of our oldest and closest friends. I’m including it here because it conveys how we feel at present, looking back over the half-century of our lives. Dear ____, This week it will be announced that we are no longer Jehovah’s Witnesses. We owe you, our friends of many years, an explanation. We love and miss you deeply. We are not upset over the human imperfections of anyone, being fully aware of our own imperfections. True, we have been hurt on occasion, but who hasn’t. We are not disgruntled or bitter. Our withdrawal over the past two years is the product of over ten years of legitimate questioning and subsequent research, carried out prayerfully and objectively. We have not rushed to any of our conclusions. We have not left God, his Son or his Word. Jesus warns, and Paul counsels, that it is our obligation to carefully evaluate religious affiliations and teachings. Thus, we do not believe we are sinning against the Holy Spirit by evaluating the organization and its teachings in the light of the Scriptures and fact. Genuine truth stands up to such scrutiny. The organization does not. Those who have gone before us in making such an evaluation have been slandered and vilified by those loyal to the organization. We expect to be treated no differently. However, we hope that this brief explanation will leave you with some understanding of why, in good conscience, we can no longer support the organization. We are not driven by pride, as we are admitting the mistake of supporting, out of our own negligence and lack of information, for most of our lives, erroneous teachings, revisionist history, deception and unloving policies. We are willing to wait on Jehovah, and we continue to do so. However, it is clear to us that waiting on Jehovah is not the same thing as waiting on the organization. Shun us if you must, but please know that we will never judge you but will always accept you, love you and never forget you. Love, Frank and Barbara We received a number of responses to this letter. Most of them were predictable. However, a couple of them were actually kind and non-judgmental.
TodayThe social vacuum that was created when we became inactive two years ago has been gradually filled with new friends, those who saw the light before we did, including our children, and our wonderful families. Although the first year was difficult for us, our newfound freedom was certainly worth the pain. Having more time to pursue art, music, travel and study has improved our lives beyond anything we could have imagined “in this old system.” At this point, we have no desire to affiliate with any religious group. Among the resources that we found very helpful were Raymond Franz’s two books and the website he contributes to, http://www.commentarypress.com. We also greatly appreciated the concise style of http://www.jwfacts.com and personal experiences and diversity of http://www.freeminds.org. JWN has been a tremendous resource. We are grateful to the owner Simon and so many of the regular contributors. We have enjoyed forging lasting friendships with some of you and hope for the opportunity to meet many more of you. Looking back, even though we no longer have “all the answers,” we are happy to have replaced the cultic dissonance with peaceful consonance and are enjoying a life of greater discovery than we ever allowed ourselves in the “Spiritual Paradise.” Please leave me a comment below - I will check back periodically and reply when I can.
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Comments (89)
  written by John White , August 11, 2009 What a fantastically written experience. I really enjoyed reading it and thank you for taking the time to document it. I, too, was struck by the vacuum left after the 1995 change to "the generation" understanding. I never saw it coming and although I didn't realize it, this change in doctrine was the start of my fading. What supported my fading was all the information I discovered on the Internet (www.freeminds.org - www.watchtowercomments.com - www.sixscreensofthewatchtower.com - www.jwfacts.com - www.silentlambs.org - etc.). I have yet to read COC (by Ray Franz) but someday plan to read it. I'm quite sure it will support my feelings about this organization - that is, it's man-made and not from God or His spirit. What a shame that so many are being mislead. report abuse
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 written by Darrek , August 11, 2009 I loved your story, I was in Brooklyn Bethel Myself around 2003-2004, I wonder if we crossed paths? I look forward to more of your stories! report abuse
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 written by T , August 11, 2009 Thanks for the story! It is unbelievable what the "organzation" does to people, and how it has such a force on the thinking of the individuals that attend. They are so scared to be seen with someone that is disfellowshipped. They won't show them the loving kindness that God wants them to show. They just shun you and expect the guilt to be so severe that you will come back. I know many Ex-JW that are suicidal because of there family not wanting to have anything to do with them. I don't think Jesus would treat people in such a manner. Thanks for sharing Frank! I would love to meet you some day! report abuse
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 written by Bamse Bra Kar , August 11, 2009 I am living in Norway and discovered the truth about the truth a year ago. I stopped attending meetings and gradualy feel the upbuilding of my self-esteem. I feel the same thinking as you do about God, Christ and freedom. I have also read the two books of R. Franz. The organization have my children and grandchildren as hostiles. I have to keep silent, but I write a lot on the web instead. Thank you very much for sharing your lifestory with us. report abuse
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 written by Marilyn , August 11, 2009 What a cool web-site, and your story is really beautifully written and the photos gave faces to the story (besides the one taken in Vegas was too good to not use!)I'm glad this web site was mentioned in the other thread going. You don't have to write me back. I imagine you'll be sorting through so many responses and questions from others. You should write a book!!!!! report abuse
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 written by Gary , August 11, 2009 Hi Frank...it's Gary Korngold, a voice from the past...what a surprise to read your story. I have often thought of you, Barbara and your folks. I would love to catch up with you and catch up on the last 35 years or so!! I still remember the great times we had a skids in the BH Congregation. Drop me an e-mail at \n This e-mail address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it '> This e-mail address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it and we can exchange numbers. Look forward to hearing from you!! report abuse
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 written by Randy , August 11, 2009 There are so many fine people in the Watchtower movement, yet the fear of losing their grip on their own supporters has forced the leadership to push out all talent and realism left in their own people, and dictate all matters of one's personal life. You and Barbara are examples of the many truly real and fun people that, even now, still reside behind the tower of fear. Please continue to be a light and inspiration to others! report abuse
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 written by Graham M , August 11, 2009 Thank you.. from someone so lost and lonely for so many years. The way you have presented is exactly how I feel. I have no affiliation to any other church/religion, and despair of much of what is written in "attack" on JWD and Freeminds.. but there are always a few diamonds on the beach. Thank you for sparkling and giving me hope. Gird up, stride out and build on your joy. MANY many thanks. report abuse
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 written by Paul & Sam , August 12, 2009 Hey F & B - you have surely lit our lives up, as you did many before us. We're with you in spirit on your journey and glad that the karmic forces of JWN and Sam's basic instinct for good friends threw us together in person. The exit of the best and brightest continues...please not too much longer for our other friends... report abuse
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 written by Frank Kavelin , August 12, 2009 Amen to that! report abuse
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 written by Marvin Shilmer , August 12, 2009 What a life experience you have had. Thanks so much for sharing. Warm regards, Marvin Shilmer report abuse
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 written by mjhunter , August 13, 2009 Great to read your story Frank. What a waste that the Watch Tower Society refuses to let people leave quietly and with dignity. Just shows up how cultish they are. report abuse
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 written by Claire Hendy , August 13, 2009 What an inspirational story! Thank you so much for sharing your experiences with us and welcome to freedom in Christ! report abuse
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 written by Kristina Berger , August 13, 2009 Thanks for sharing your story.. I finally left the organization in 1995, and one of the things that was most surprising is that I made friends who cared for me unconditionally. I didn't have to be perfect anymore! My biggest challenge was working through the demon fear which now I know was a huge controlling factor. Later, after 7 years of psycho-therapy and a bachelors degree in psych, I realized how I was controlled and manipulated I was. I grew up a JW, so I didn't know how life would be without being a JW. I had to learn that I am still a good person, caring and taking care of others. I didn't "need" to be controlled. hugs, -k report abuse
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 written by A Concerned JW , August 13, 2009 hi Frank & Barbara What a story, am still a paid up JW finding it hard to take any other line in view of the investment in the social network, but its stories like yours which help me and others to realise that there is so much love out there and myriads of others on the same wavelength waiting for the right moment. You sound lovely friends to have and next time am in LA will hope to meet. report abuse
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 written by Terri Stultz (Meechan) , August 15, 2009 Hi Frank (& Barbara)! Joan emailed me with this website which I never knew about before. I was anxious to read your story since Joan told me some months ago that you and Barb had left the organization. I was quite surprised to hear that, but of course, it has been since the late 80's that I have last seen you, and so much can happen in 20 years. My departure from L.A. and the organization (and my abusive husband!) in 1990 seems like eons ago. I was looking at old photos recently and came across some I took one evening while Kevin and I were at your house for dinner with the 2 of you. Pete was still in diapers and had wound himself up in your living room curtains...he was sitting on the floor and his little chubby legs were about all you could see! There are funny poses of Barb and I on your staircase... good memories! I have only the best of memories of you and your family. I am so glad, however, to know that you both have had your eyes opened and discovered the real "truth." I appreciated your comment that your life has improved beyond anything you could imagine. I completely agree. When I left back in 1990, I initially felt that the religon was right and I was wrong, and that I would indeed die at Armageddon (or as I say now, I believed I would be killed by God) for leaving the organization. But I knew I could no longer live feeling like I felt, which could best be described as "crazy." I felt that whatever remaining years I had left before dying at Armageddon would at least be spent not feeling crazy, but being true to myself. Well, I can't remember how long exactly that it took, but in much less than a year the brainwashing lost its hold on me and I began seeing things more clearly. In a very short period of time actually, I began to see that it was not I who was crazy, it was the religon.... although being raised in it and all of the stuff we were spoon-fed from infancy is certainly enough to make one crazy! I did a small amount of research, or should actually say that I coincidentally (and therefore, I believe, providentially) had information and people cross my path which confirmed my discovery that I had been raised in a cult and brainwashed by the best, including my devout father. I can honestly say that since the very day I left I have NEVER doubted that what I did was the right thing in leaving, and that the organization is not simply some harmless, well-intentioned Christian religon. For a time I felt it was my obligation, having "seen the light," to turn any I could away from it. Fortunately, before long I realized that is not my duty. Everyone must find their own path. And if people don't leave it, that is all right, too. I could go on and on, but I will save some for later! I want you to know that I hold the fondest of love for you and Barb in my heart, and excitedly look forward to talking to you both! I still play (on the piano) the song I wrote for my father which I had you put on paper for me, Frank. It is very dear to me. My father died of melanoma in 1994, and he stood firm to his beliefs to the end, but allowed me to come to his home to assist my mom in caring for him during his last 3 months of life. He would not greet me or converse beyond a yes or no, but in the last 2 days of his life, I sat at his bedside and nursed him with the most profound and genuine love, telling him what he meant to me and recalling my precious memories of him. He was cognizant but quiet. I knew I needed to give him the gift of my forgiving and unconditional love despite the pain I'd felt in our relationship my entire life, in order to live with myself after his death. I also knew intuitively it was the absolute right thing to do, and I felt God led me to that. I actually feel that was part of the whole plan of getting me back to Colorado. I was in the room when he passed, at home in my parents' bedroom (which is where I now live and that is my bedroom ironically). A long-time elder friend of his who I had known and loved since early childhood was on the other side of the bed, and we both stayed there, quiet and peaceful, until finally the funeral home came to retrieve my father. That profound experience convinced me in the fact that we DO INDEED have spirits or souls which are separate from our physical bodies and there IS INDEED life after death, so much more life after death than we can even imagine. I will also tell you that my father has come to me twice in dreams. I have dreamed of him many times, don't misunderstand, but those were just run-of-the-mill dreams. These 2 dreams were entirely different. Very, very cool. Well, I digress - sorry! Love to you two and please contact me as soon as you can....I would love to exchange phone numbers but don't want to write it here. If you would email me at my own email address I will respond immediately, or include your phone number there so I can call you! report abuse
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 written by Eric F. , August 15, 2009 I was so moved by your testimony. God is blessing you both. Your reward is great; for you chose the hard route for Christ's sake. You have chosen to go outside the camp into public "disgrace" just as Jesus did(Heb. 13:12-13)! I have some good friends whom I love dearly in the Jehovah's Witnesses. I also experienced God's grace through the trial of leaving a cult (The old Worldwide Church of God cult). I beg you both to now as God to open your mind, with all sincerety, and read the letters of the new Test as complete letters: from beginning to end. (My church only had me study their cherry picked bits of script, here a lil, there a little... so as to support their presuppositions). The true God will show you if you ask as I did. Though we are faithless; He remains faithful for He cannot deny Himself...2 Tim2. He Loves us more than we can imagine! My journey out of a cult is 18 years ago now, and God has done so much in my life to bless me, so that I may be a blessing to others. I witness to so many of God's desire to enter into unconditional covenant with them. I serve as an elder now in a Presbyterian church, I always say, "we must be Christians first and denomination second". My dear friend in Massachusetts, along with his family are apparently content with the JWs...and I know God will work it out for them, as i also continually pray for them. Jesus Christ gives us his eternal spirit of life and and a heart desiring obedience, by His accomplishment alone. Just as surely as we were born into a life of spiritual death and sin because of what Adam did(Rom 4-5). I was born into the spirit of the life of Christ(Rom  cool report abuse
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 written by Blueeyes54 , August 16, 2009 Around memorial of 2003 I was praying and meditaing. In my minds eye apppeared an intricately carved wooden box, emerging from a cloud. I was not asleep, not on dope and I am sane. I went to the bible and looked up everything about boxes, crates, etc. Poor, rich, or royal it didn't matter. One phrase kept coming to mind, "Look outside the box." I did not know then that the box meant the Organization. It judged you after Jesus judged it, so welcome to "All things new." We will look forward to your wonderful loving shepherding comments. More music, more joy, more love, and you'll never be labeled a Pharisee. report abuse
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 written by Elizabeth , August 16, 2009 Thank you for sharing your story...you very eloquently express much that I feel. report abuse
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written by Elizabeth , August 16, 2009 Just want to add "you will know the truth, and the truth will set you free" has taken on a whole new meaning for so many of us! Here's to freedom and peace of mind! The last straw for me and my husband was the condoning of child abuse and sweeping under the rug pedophiles. report abuse
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 written by laubbaum , August 17, 2009 nice to read that! i hope you will go on happy in your life... i am dissociated since 2004 and found a completely new and better freedom for my life, including unconditional friends, love and compassion, that has nothing to do with judgement or precondition. report abuse
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 written by Jenni Heraud , August 18, 2009 wow.....cannot believe how amazing your story is. You are so brave. I too had a massive issue with the change of doctrine with regard to 1914. amidst a dreadful story of my own......all ingredients are the same though....disfellowshippings and my father removed as an elder....letters to the society....standard answers. yep, it's all there. Someone once said to me that they now consider themselves more a NON jw than an EX jw. I liked that. kind puts the whole thing in perspective, takes away that last vestige of control...........hugs to you both. Jenni. report abuse
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 written by Kitty , August 18, 2009 Hello, I was so happy to hear that your children all made it out with you. That is my dream but since I have a large family all in the "truth" and married to ones that have been raised in the "truth" I just don't see how it could happen. If I leave it would shatter our family. My only hope is that some how we can all put enough public pressure on the society that they are forced to let up on the shunning. I have posted a blog on Oprah.com I will continue to post blogs every where I can. I hope all of us that have learned the real truth will be able to put the pressure on them by use of the internet. It's become the Governing Body's greatest enemy. PS I hope the new song book will omit the song about the poor little bees getting molested. report abuse
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 written by virginia h , August 18, 2009 What's that saying about 6 degrees of separation? We've never met but I'm Terri Lynn's aunt and Lorraine's sister. (Terri told us about this website.) Lowell died about 16 months ago - quite suddenly after years of disability. Don't know if you were aware of that. However, I have not spoken to my sister since I left the Witnesses 28 years ago. She was my closest sibling in age and in heart, so it was a long road to getting past losing her. Per our "worldly sister" Lorraine has been grief stricken and slow to rebound. I often wonder why the hope of the resurrection hasn't provided her the solace and comfort that was always promised by the organization. Since Lowell's death she now inquires about me and my older sister who is also an ex JW. I won't allow myself to think that means anything except casual curiousity. The years since leaving the organization have been the best of my life. Being the victim of an abusive first marriage (he wasn't a Witness) and fertile ground for a controlling religion gutted me. Looking back I wonder how I had the strength to leave both. Perhaps becoming and leaving the Witnesses as an adult gave me an advantage for rebuilding my life that those raised in it don't have. My best to you and Barbara. There will be years of residual effects from your experience. Going near any religious institution gives me the willies. My life feels right and I don't need to know why we're here or where we're going. Today is enough. Thanks for sharing your story and letting me associate with your open community. report abuse
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 written by kylee , August 18, 2009 Your children are so fortunate to have you now. Released and free. I was raised in the truth by a father who claimed to be one of the anointed and a faithful auxiliary pioneering mother. I left, I came back and I did this three times. So afraid was I that I will die at Armageddon and that my kids would perish too. My children were the ones that said it best, ("out of the mouth of babes")"Jehovah and Jesus IS love and nobody should tell you what makes you close to him or not but you and him." That was the end for me. And then I discovered all these communities, you and everyone here that contributes are a big part of my healing. Thank you from the bottom of my heart. I have not hugged my parents in 10 years. Love on top of Love. report abuse
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 written by Frank Kavelin , August 20, 2009 Thank you all for your kind and supportive comments. Terri: We need your email address. Virginia: So sorry to hear of the estrangement of so many years from your sister. Kylee: "I have not hugged my parents in 10 years." Barbara and I were so moved by that. report abuse
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 written by sam grebner , August 20, 2009 I couldnt hold back the tears as the truth has so often eluded me. i was raised a witnesss and as the so of an Elder was expected to conform to the teachings laid before me. How my ignorance led me astry for so long now. Now married and an USMC veteran it is all the more important that our voices b heard. I wish for you all the best and please continue the fight. We should talk sometime...please drop me a line at \n This e-mail address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it '> This e-mail address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it I think we have much to discuss. report abuse
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 written by Mary Wright , August 23, 2009 Thank you for that.. I'm only 17 and left JWs recently after being raised in it. Hardest thing I've ever done, leaving all my friends and family, so I strongly sympathise with you. I feel very lucky to be able to see JWs for what it really is, and have the opportunity to start really living my life. I'm grateful for every witness that is able to see past the lies that are there to make you a closed minded follower. report abuse
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 written by Johnny Casas Marquez , August 24, 2009 Hola, welcome to the group of free thinkers. I lost 50 years of my life. I was 10 when dad became a witness. I was baptized at 12-13 in a river in Hollister. Went to KM school for 2 weeks in 1968 to Pittsburg. Sold my busness in 1986 and moved to Mexico where I started the first english group in Mexico at Lake Capala. Mexico headquarters at Tescoco said they would not help us if we got arrested for being illegal in Mexico at that time.I was an elder for many years. Much to say but in 1989 I said enough . Thru much research I come to realize that the society fit all the signs of a cult. Belonged to the Jeswit for a few years. Again, welcome. report abuse
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 written by victor benitez , August 24, 2009 Good for you and your wife! Transparency of evidence is essential to achieving freedom from manipulative, W.T., oligarchs. Raymond Franz, has done a superlative job with his writings. He pulls no punches; transparency of evidence, in his writings, will not dissappoint those seeking objectivity. Congratulations, again. I might have met you, perhaps 25 years ago. Did you ever meet my sister, Luzmila Benitez? ex member, victor report abuse
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written by victor benitez , August 24, 2009 p.s. my phone number is 213 387 3857. report abuse
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 written by samantha , August 27, 2009 hi, barbara & frank, thanks for sharing. i thoroughly enjoyed your story. well,i'll be attending the district convention this october, so i was wondering if that stuff about a new song book is realy true. you know, i feel that some of the brothers may be getting bored weith the 225 songs in the present songbook, so i'm looking forward to the new one. well, i, too, have had my share of bittersweet experiences in the organization. infact, i'm currently an ex-publisher, looking to be re-instated soon, though. just in case you want to write me, please send me an e-mail. report abuse
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 written by Rich Baker , August 27, 2009 Frank and Barbara, I truly enjoyed hearing your testimony. It gives me a glimmer of hope concerning my own immediate family. I have been a Christian since I was 16 years old. Sometime around 20, I had "fallen away" from what God wanted from me and turned to my own selfish lusts. I stopped hearing the Word and started believing my own doctrine. It was at that time that I met my wife, a Jehovah's Witness, now almost of 19 years. If I am thankful for anything over the past 20 years, it is that my experience has forced me to KNOW WHAT I believe and WHY I believe it. I have re-committed myself(or I should say, the Holy Spirit re-kindled my heart) to the service of His Majesty, my Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ. Sometimes I think about all that has transpired in my life and think there is no hope for my family. But, with God, nothing is impossible. I pray daily that my family will come into the knowledge of the real Truth; and that the Truth will set them free. This brings me to the realization of what might transpire after they leave the Watchtower organization. I have read many of the comments on this page and found that a lot of people don't have any affiliation with any other "organization" after leaving the false doctrines of the Watchtower. I have also a couple of friends that have revealed their past dealings with the JW's. The common emotion derived from these people at first is one of total withdrawal from any form of "religion". This saddens me because so many of the former JW's miss out on the real Truth; a blessed and peaceful life in Jesus Christ. Sure there will be hardships, and sadness, etc., but the confidence we have in knowing Jesus Christ suffered all these things for us FIRST, is far more edifying than the Watchtower or any other cult can offer. Please feel free to respond to this with any helpful information that might help me in ministering The Truth to my wife and kids. I understand the choke-hold the Watchtower has on it's people. But like the Word says, greater is He that is in you, than he that is in the world." It is God's Holy Spirit that will break the yoke of bondage that this cult has on it's people. I pray one day that I will rejoice in song and worship with my entire family. Love in Christ, Rich Baker report abuse
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 written by Barbara Kavelin , August 28, 2009 The names of the governing body members are known, as well as life stories of prominent ones in the organization. The speakers at district conventions and circuit assemblies are announced, and some travel great distances to hear and record some of the better speakers (David Ianelli being one), their names are very well known and people line up in an almost worshipful way to have an audience with them. Most JW’s I knew were aware of who wrote “We Thank You Jehovah”, “Life Without End at Last” and “From House to House”. There is no great honor in this, only an acknowledgement of one’s contribution. Nobody is saying that song 191 or 210 is brilliant music and Frank should be honored for writing it. It was mentioned as a way of letting people who read here understand the level of his involvement in the religion and the time spent devoting service to it. It is the governing body who is increasingly demanding honor and obedience – if you so much as hint that you are not obedient to their interpretations, they publicly execute you to make an example of your lack of “honor” to their teachings. This has nothing to do with bringing honor to the God of the universe. It is done to tighten their hold on their members and instill fear of them. Believe me, we are not “proud” of having been attached to this God-dishonoring religion for our whole lives. Barbara Kavelin (Notice I signed my name, “composer”. You didn’t – are you afraid of something?) report abuse
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 written by Paul M , August 28, 2009 @ 'composer' This policy of honoring Jehovah would also be surprising to early Christians - followers of Christ became known as 'Christians', not Jehovah's Witnesses (Acts 11:24) - followers of Christ declared the good news of 'the Lord Jesus' (Acts 11:21), this good news was all about Jesus' death and resurrection (Acts 4:33, 1 Cor 2:2), not about billions of people being snuffed out by Jehovah at Armageddon [sidenote: Armageddon is only mentioned once in the Bible and never in the Gospels or in any of the epistles to the the 1st C Christian congregations, therefore how important was Armageddon to Christians in the 1st C?] - followers of Christ gave him the same honour as they gave the Father (John 5:22,23) and went so far as to call Jesus God and even gave him worship, as do the angels in heaven (John 9:38, John 20:28, Heb 1:6) - followers of Christ realised that the Holy Spirit would teach them all they would need to know about God (John 14:26, Acts 1: cool - followers of Christ understood, believed and preached that there is only one mediator between God and men and that through this mediator alone can one receive forgiveness of sins and that this mediator is accessible to all (1 Tim 2:5,6) - followers of Christ put faith in his name, extolled his name, preached his name, believed in his name and cried out in his name. They bore his name and preached his name. They did not put faith in, extoll, preach, believe in or cry out in/to the name 'Jehovah'. They recognised that the name Jesus was elevated above every name and in that name alone could one receive salvation and eternal life (see previous point about only one mediator) (John 14:34, Acts 3:16, Acts 4:12,Acts 4:18, Romans 10:9,10) - followers of Christ saw him as 'the Truth' - followers of Christ did not claim to have knowledge of his return. Yes, they wondered when it would be, but Jesus put them straight in Acts 1:7 Taking the above 8 points alone, would you agree they accurately reflect the faith and beliefs of the early Christian congregation? If so, which of them do Jehovah's Witnesses harmonise with the most? Using the name Jesus above any other name? Actually being allowed to have Christ as their mediator? Perhaps giving Jesus honour and worship? Or maybe relying solely on the Holy Spirit as their teacher and counsellor? Or maybe in not claiming 'divinely revealed' knowledge of Christ's return? Please compare and contrast the multi billion dollar property and publishing empire aka Jehovah's Witnesses with the simple faith of early Christians. report abuse
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written by Frank Kavelin , August 28, 2009 I’m confident that the majority of visitors to this site will identify Composer’s straw man argument and ad hominem attack. His post is effective, though, in demonstrating, in miniature, the flawed and faulty reasoning and argumentation put forth by the publishing company he represents and is beholden to. report abuse
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written by mjhunter , August 28, 2009 This was posted earlier; "This policy of focusing attention on Jehovah, thus honoring him, is surprising to some. A few years ago, when setting up a sound system for a public talk in New York City’s Central Park, the Witnesses were playing one of the Kingdom Melodies tapes as a test for the system. A well-dressed couple asked one of the Witnesses what the music was. Thinking that the couple were Witnesses, he answered: “That’s Kingdom Melodies No. 4.” “Yes, but who composed that music?” they asked. The Witness replied: “Oh, the composer is anonymous.” The couple responded: “People who compose that kind of music do not do it anonymously.” The Witness replied: “But Jehovah’s Witnesses do.” Yes, they do this so that all HONOR GOES TO JEHOVAH GOD! (w91 2/1, p.13)" I'm assuming it was posted by a loyal Jehovah's Witness. If so, may I ask, where is your honour for Jesus? You see, if all the honour goes to Jehovahs, as you so proudly announce, that must mean that by default, no honour goes to Jesus. Is that a fair summation? If so, please consider John 5:23 in order that all may honor the Son just as they honor the Father. He that does not honor the Son does not honor the Father who sent him. Serious stuff. A side point; what does the way the couple in New York were dressed have to do with anything? report abuse
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written by Marilyn , August 29, 2009 I say we all go to the beach and stare at the ocean (with a nice drink in hand, an umbrella and a few snacks). You will be a lot closer to god that way then sitting in a church or kingdom hall. Barbara, when you come to visit I will introduce you to my horse, "Ella", and you will experience my way of finding my spirituality. Love, your lil' sis report abuse
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 written by Peter Kavelin , August 29, 2009 Composer said, Sadly, some of those composers don't give honor to Jehovah God anymore, since we know that they composed song 191 and 210. Composer, How predictable that even in the face of very strong fact-based objections to the WTS by Frank all you have is an ad-hominem attack. The first one being that Frank is arrogant and seeking attention having written some kingdom songs. As Barbara pointed out, this comment was intended to show the level of involvement Frank once had with the organization. It is not very characteristic of Frank to brag about that, especially given the client involved (the WTS) and his involvement with other more high profile music endeavors, which were not mentioned. I've never heard him brag about having written those songs or any other pieces of music written for the society. Ever. You also sarcastically quoted Frank and Barbara back to them and then chimed in with your own ridiculous response, as follows... "We are not driven by pride...": Be serious??? I would really like to know what you meant by this smug, smiley-emoticon-punctuated post. I suspect you're implying that Frank exaggerated his time and energy in devotion to the organization. I'm his son. This is absolutely false. He performed the duties of an elder for 26 years, hosted the book study for 25 years, sacrificed vacations with his family, spent many, many evenings after work to compose music for videos and CDs for the society and many weeks recording the music at Brooklyn and Patterson, gave monthly public talks, all while raising 2 kids and working full time, as did my Mother. If that was indeed what you were implying, how dare you. Composer, if you are who I think you are, you are completely supported by Bethel and have no clue about life outside of your bubble-like environment. You have never experienced raising a family while working a full time job and serving as an elder. report abuse
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 written by a newbie , August 29, 2009 i truly know what freedom means and will never take it for granted ever again in the time that i studied i found out that i would be restricted not only in my association with family and friends who were always supportive of me and loved me unconditionally but the freewill God gave me was being taken away by a man made organization it feels good to donate and help others even when they use their freewill to worship different from me. GOd bless you and you family and stay strong there are truly some good people in the WORLD. report abuse
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 written by Gary K. , August 31, 2009 I believe Frank, Barbara and Peter have been much more gracious in their response to Composer. My response is more to the point...you are a knothead Composer! report abuse
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 written by Al , September 03, 2009 I am one of JW still somewhat active but I am unsure not that this is Jehovah's organization but I believe that there will be a refinement A BIG SHAKEDOWN FROM THE TOP by Jesus Christ when he comes to inspect the Ruling class ,the Watchtower article last week was ver,very disturbing and sounds like a desperate attempts to hold on to power I'm from Cuba so I know how dictators behave and how they use mind control as power ,but I say to myself just like the apostles told Jesus ,where would we go?? Am I right in my reasoning??? report abuse
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written by Al , September 03, 2009 my full name is Abdiel("servant of Jehovah")I am doing extensive research on the organization and I don't know where this might lead me I have been born in the truth and don't know anything else but I am Praying to Jehovah and He knows that all that I seek is the "truth" I trust in him with all my heart and soul and I know he will lead me on the path of righteousness ANY BROTHER THAT WISHES TO CONTACT ME CAN DO SO AT \n This e-mail address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it '> This e-mail address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it PS.I would love to speak or chat With brother gavelin and hear his story also I would like some input on e-watchman.com and his views on WT and the UN report abuse
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written by Abdiel , September 03, 2009 Here's a thought,why don't we go back to being Bible students and worship Jehovah God and Jesus christ with only pure teachings from the bible and join forces so that brothers who flee have a place to keep worshiping Jehovah? P.S. I'm not talking about the people that left when rutherford ousted the 4 leaders that questioned him that only belive in Rusell!!! even though I admire the zeal and energy of brother Rusell report abuse
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written by wasblindnowisee , September 13, 2009 These people tear families apart children are worse off when they faulter because they dont have the loving guidance of their parents when they need them most im sorry i ever exposed my child to them i let him know everyday that i love him even when he stumbles and that i will never let anyone take the joy out of his life. no wonder those poor people are so dependent on anti depressants God does no put more on us than we can bare when you need drugs to cope its more than you can bare report abuse
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 written by Joshua , September 19, 2009 Hope you guys are doing great! This is a great testimony for those who still believe in their doctrine! report abuse
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 written by James Clarence , September 22, 2009 Why did you meet with the Judicial Committe? If you had felt that you had attained a free mind, why did you meet with men who you knew were gunning for you? I am confused why somone would leave a religion only to report back to them? Can you explain please? Since you decided to leave was it not your business to not accept the invitation to be questioned? I will elaborate if you want me to. Thank you for your time. report abuse
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written by James Clarence , September 22, 2009 Sorry I miss read your comment. I am very confused how you can be disfellowshiped by hearsay? According to the Shepparding The Flock book a person is not to be judged by gossip. So apparanently after two years of not associating you were disfellowshiped? In the book Gospel account did not Niccodemous say "Our law does not judge a man until it hears him out?" Am I missing something here? Did you attempt to make contact with friends of your past and they construed that you had deviated in their opinion? report abuse
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written by Barbara Kavelin , September 22, 2009 To James Clarence: We did NOT meet with a committee. After two years of inactivity and no association with the congregation, an elder called my husband to say that they had sufficient evidence of his "teaching" to call a judicial meeting. He asked if we would attend and my husband said no. We were asked if we were "disassociating ourselves" and our reply was no. They then informed us that a meeting would be held and we would be informed of the outcome. My husband told the elder "I'm sure you will do what you are told to do." We did not want to play by their rules any longer. We got a call a week later advising us that we were to be disfellowshipped. We did not appeal the decision. Enforced shunning of any individual that dares to question the doctrine of the governing body, even privately to close friends, is the greatest power that the organization has over the congregation. The threat of losing your family and life long friends is a powerful club that they hold over their heads. Anyone who does so is vilified as proud, arrogant and (God forbid) an independent thinker. The consequence is the big scarlet letter A is placed on them, the most wicked person that you can be - an Apostate. If enforced shunning were done away with, I believe there would be a significant exodus from JWs because they could walk away and still maintain some type of relationship to those dear to them. The governing body demands complete and unquestioning obedience to their teachings. This paranoid and high control behavior is a well known method used by cults. They rule through fear, certainly not love. The forced separation of parents from their own children, etc. is akin to murder. Perhaps it is worse, because they are still alive but treat the disfellowshipped member as if they were dead. In reply to Al, who asked the question "WHERE do we go?" The statement that Peter said to Jesus was "WHO would I go to - you have the sayings of everlasting life". We walked away from the organization run by nine men in Brooklyn who have presumptuously claimed that one can gain life only through association with THEM. Jesus said that where two or more are gathered in his name, he is among them. The governing body's claim of being the mediator and sole dispenser of truth on earth is unscriptural and blasphemous, in my opinion. I hope that clarifies the matter for you. Barbara Kavelin report abuse
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 written by Al , September 24, 2009 barbara, thanks for your thouhgts I understand what u mean by what Jesus said but I'm thinking of forming a non denominational bible student group similar to what Russell did what do you think??? please write me at me email \n This e-mail address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it '> This e-mail address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it report abuse
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written by Al , September 24, 2009 We walked away from the organization run by nine men in Brooklyn who have presumptuously claimed that one can gain life only through association with THEM. Jesus said that where two or more are gathered in his name, he is among them. The governing body's claim of being the mediator and sole dispenser of truth on earth is unscriptural and blasphemous, in my opinion. RIGHT ON SISTER WELL SAID!!!! report abuse
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written by James Clarence , September 25, 2009 Dear Fred and Barbara, I was reading through this site and came across a man who seems to be mourning his death. The reason he feels that way is due to the change made by the WatchTower with "generation". When I was a young child many who felt 1975 was the key date did some things that would blow your mind. Do you feel and Fred feel that you are in a state of mourning because the 'End' or Return of Christ may be off in the Future or some other concept we have not considered. The poster really showed that he was in it for a reward instead of a great love of our Saviour Jesus Christ. report abuse
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 written by Trapped Witness , October 02, 2009 It's best to have a viable exit plan from the organization. Many in the congregation feel exactly as both of you do. Truth is self evident. No organization run by incompetent, self-serving, status seeking, uncaring, uneducated, unloving, petty, power driven egocentric hypocrites can sustain it's foothold on people's lives. Jehovah God won't allow it. But till that happens it's best to lay low and seemingly get lost in semi-inactivity just enough not to be targeted for vilification. Never ever complain, just appear as someone who is spiritually weak, and hopefully get reconnected to the real world and God's grace. report abuse
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 written by david Shurtleff , October 19, 2009 I wait and long for the day that my family and former friends will wake up!! Being a JW robbed me of my future and time with my family that I can not replace. At first I was just mad at the leaders, now I am sad for all members. I was a witness for almost 30 years, an elder for 7 and wish I could turn back time and relive those years that I waisted on following mens ideas which I was taught was Gods. Hope some of the people that read your testomony will wake up and get out before they see 30 years of thier life wasted too!! report abuse
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 written by Johnny 5 , October 20, 2009 50 years wasted. Thats right, I was 10-60. Servant-elder,pioneer, you name it. Worked isolated villages in old Mexico for a while. Settled in Lake Chapala in 68. Started first english speaking group there in Mexico when it was still ilegal. Asked the headquarters in Mexico city for there blessings and helo. Their answer was : you are on your own. If the police arrest you, don't count on our help since we are recognized as an educational group, not a religion. More later on commitee meetings there and the injustes handed out based on their upbringing. report abuse
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 written by barbara , October 24, 2009 Thanks so much for sharing your testimony. The Spirit of God, and not the active force like JWS say, is breaking through the Watch Tower Society, in order to set the captives free. Let us continue to pray for those sincere people who are deceived and do not even know it. report abuse
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 written by keko , October 27, 2009 tu é um idiota ,jeová vai te queimar com o fogo da fúria dele. seu falso profetaaaaaaaaa!!!!!!!!!!!! report abuse
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 written by Paul Stefanski , November 02, 2009 Hey Frank! This is your old friend Paul Stefanski, remember me? I left the JWs about a year after I was baptized and your mother was long-time friends with my mother. I am so happy that you saw the light! Now you know why I left. Like Ray Franz, I also had a so-called crisis of conscience. And though I've missed your parents so very much, still I had to do what I had to do. But I do have very fond memories of you and your family. Give my big hello to the family. Godspeed and congratulations! report abuse
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 written by homedbn , November 08, 2009 Dear Rich Baker You wrote: "Please feel free to respond to this with any helpful information that might help me in ministering The Truth to my wife and kids". There is probably nothing better or more powerful than patiently studying the TRUE "good news" with your family. This could take up to four years to penetrate the veil of 2 Cor 3:16 and 4:4. You'd be surprised how much of the true "good news" can actually be found in the Watchtower library, albeit like a 1,000 piece puzzle all over the place. If your family accepts this "good news" into their heart, using only the Watchtower library and Bible, they will at some stage be compelled to speak about it and be instantly denounced as apostates - job done. A good way to start may be to first close all books then ask yourself and your family to write down on a piece of paper what the "good news" is in a single word. Then expand to a phrase, sentence and paragraph. Invariably the result will be "good news" = kingdom = message of restoration. This is what you have been taught by oral tradition (religion) as a JW. It is apostasy of the very worst kind - not because of what is present but because of what is missing. The "good news" is the most powerful medicine available to humans at this time - only elders are taught by the WTBTS to REMOVE around 12 of the 13 key ingredients. Just check how many of the key ingredients you and your family left out during the "closed book" test by AFTERWARDS reading w79 12/15 pp. 5-6 par 1 (sentence containing the word "primarily"), Isaiah 61:1 and Romans 5:18. You might want to consider that this is a process and not an event. Be patient. Pray to Jehovah for strength, humility, direction, protection, blessing, and most importantly REPENTANCE and FAITH - even if you do not at this point see or understand why. At any rate if you feel you may benefit from some our family's summaries compiled from around 4,000 hours of careful research in the Watchtower library, and rejected as apostasy, feel free to send an email to \n This e-mail address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it '> This e-mail address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it (remove x from email address to make it work). We would just request that you first send us your and your family's initial summary of what the "good news" is. Best wishes and Christian love homedbn report abuse
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written by homedbn , November 08, 2009 Hi Frank & Barbara Thank you for sharing your story in such a positive and moving way. Your warm, caring and loving tone remind me of many others such as http://www.perimeno.ca/ Yes, we too were blinded for decades by claims that have no basis in scripture, indeed are condemned therein. We are still surprised by the seemingly unending parallels between the elders and governing body in Jesus' day and that of the WTBTS today. They kill (aka disfellowship) any that would dare to follow Jesus' instead of them. The murder the high-priest out of the "good news" they believe and teach. They murder the character and reputation of true Christians by labeling them as apostates. One of the many things that really hit home hard with our family is Jesus' words to the elders of likely his own home congregation in Matthew 25:13. "Woe to you, scribes and pharisees, hypocrites! because you traverse sea and dry land to make one proselyte, and when he becomes one you make him a subject for Gehenna twice as much so as yourselves". (NWT) It seems clear that Jesus did not want his followers to teach others religion (proselytize) but to teach them the true and full "good news" (evangelizing). We were astounded at the LIST of things Jesus was against in relation to RELIGION, one morning when we analyzed Matthew 23:15 - 1. Religious leaders (religionist elders and rest of the religionist hierarchy) 2. Teaching religion (oral traditions of men instead of "true worship" and the good news of The Christ = anti-christ) 3. Following religion and religious leaders (instead of God and his King-Priest = enmity with God = anti-atonement) 4. Recruiting Religious followers (following men = anti-christ) 5. Religious Bondage/captivity/control (anti-liberation, anti Isaiah 61:1) 6. Fruits of religion (hypocrisy, lovelessness, division, apostasy=unfaithfullness=double-life, self-justification or self-righteousness, anti-christ) 7. End result of following Religion (eternal destruction = anti-salvation) Yes Jesus today still views all religion as a "snare and a racket" as is therefore still treated, by religionists, as the biggest apostate who ever walked the earth. In "sh chap. 13 p. 318 par. 26" Martin Luther lists 3 fundamental points that divided the Protestants from the Roman Catholics. First, Luther believed that salvation results from “justification by faith alone” (Latin, sola fide) and not from priestly absolution or works of penance. Second, he taught that forgiveness is granted solely because of God’s grace (sola gratia) and not by the authority of priests or popes. Finally, Luther contended that all doctrinal matters are to be confirmed by Scripture only (sola scriptura) and not by popes or church councils. END QUOTE. Now how would Luther categorize the JWs today, Protestant or RC? Why when the WTBTS has so much in common with RC's, do they have so many pages of negative references to the RC's in their INDEX alone? Does one see God's hand or Satan's in this fine morass of smoke and mirrors? May Jehovah God continue to richly bless you and your precious family on your spiritual journey under the competent care and shepherding of his son, our Lord, owner, master, high-priest, liberator/deliverer, atoner/reconciler and savior. May Jehovah continue to use you to heal some of the many sheep the legalistic, apostate, religionists (wolves, weeds) have hurt, broken, fleeced, oppressed, slandered, vilified, ostracized, undermined, spiritually raped and spiritually murdered. Best wishes and Christian love homedbn report abuse
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 written by Mark , November 30, 2009 A great story! Nice to read the story behind the songs. ((: I will laugh in future when I attend the meeeting and we have to sing ((: report abuse
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 written by Mare , December 17, 2009 I love you, Randy! Please don't remove this comment... YOUR NIGHTMARE report abuse
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 written by Jess , December 17, 2009 I've been disfellowshipped for over 8 years now...My parents and me can talk, but we don't have a relationship... They are still JW's, my mom is a full-time pioneer, which happened once I was announced as DF'd...she flung herself full into the preaching work... I think I will send them a link to this story, maybe reading that someone as involved as you were in "the truth" might make them double-think their 27 year old daughter's choice she made back when she was "young & dumb"  smile The hardest part is knowing my parents think God really wishes them to not include me in their lives... How do parents do that? My little bro is now 18, and he's getting tons of pressure from them to stay "in the truth" and to "NOT be like your sister".... He seems on the fence, but we'll see.... I wish more witnesses were willing to just LOOK AT THEIR HISTORY....they look at the history of other religions and the HOLIDAYS to justify why they're wrong... So why then ignore your own history??? Thanks for the story...adds more credibilty to the rest of us "apostates" smile Love: J report abuse
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written by Paul Stefanski , December 18, 2009 Frank, I called your house this evening, your son picked up the line but we were cut off. I just wanted to say Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year to you. report abuse
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written by Paul Stefanski , December 18, 2009 Frank, I called your house this evening. We were cut off. I don't know if you and your family have gotten around to celebrate the holidays yet (maybe that has been a thing to get used to for a while yet, I don't know) but if you have, then I want to wish you all a very Merry Christmas and a Joyous New Year. report abuse
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 written by cwyatt , December 22, 2009 I enjoyed your story. I pray everday for God to expose the WTS for the false prophet and false teachers that they are. You said you did not affiliate with any religious group...that's great. I hope you only affiliate with Jesus as He's the one who saves. I am sure you've heard, being a Christian is not a religion, but a relationship. I am very happy you are your family are all free. Merry Christmas! report abuse
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 written by jerry , December 30, 2009 In 1969 I met a witness who studied with your father,his name was ed montoya,an interior designer from west LA. Do you folks remember that family at all and if so whatever happened to them. Thank you for sharing your story. report abuse
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written by Frank Kavelin , January 01, 2010 Hi Jerry. Ed and Carol Montoya studied with my father. I believe they got baptized, but shortly thereafter left the organization. If I remember correctly, they were living in Gardena, CA at the time. I've not heard anything from them since then. report abuse
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 written by Rebecca , January 29, 2010 It's funny you're the one that wrote Make The Truth Your Own. I left the JW's 14 years ago, and often think about how beautiful that song is, wishing it did not belong to that religion. Enjoyed the fact that you turned down the elder meetings. I never understood why anyone on their way out bothered with those. I wish you and your wife the best at adjusting to your new life! report abuse
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 written by Valerie Erwood Lopez Ferguson , February 16, 2010 It's good to be free, is it not? I have my own story, but for now, I'll just support yours. Frankie...I'm so happy to see your face and to know you are enjoying success in love and life. My mother was Joann Dancer, then Lopez...then Ferguson. We kissed once at a party, and from what I remember from so long ago, you got a good one Barbara! HAHA I know you have a mission here on this site so I won't distract from that too much. I just wanted you to know you are thought of and more of us are free of the Gestapo than one might imagine. Feel free to contact me any time. You can find me on Facebook under Valerie Erwood (maiden name) With Love, Valerie report abuse
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 written by JW by nature , February 25, 2010 Since your supposedly so well aware of Jehovah's Witness's than your well aware of the mere fact that your an apostate. Jesus tells the scribes and pharisees were hypocrits hence the account "get behind me Satan". The funniest thing is stupid people like you having problems with JW for lord knows what but in the end it all lays down to the fact that Satan has made sure to make you spread lies and crap regarding JW. If any of you actually followed JW's or gave an inch of care as you do this stupid site than maybe you can see she is a only Satans spon "a liar" "a scribe". Enjoy report abuse
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 written by Julie , February 25, 2010 dear nature- It is obvious the only reason for your post here is to start some name calling to make yourself feel better.If you werent blinded by your own hate and personal beliefs you would be able to read this story as a personal testament - not rumors or he said she said crap.Someone actually was living these events.Your non Christian behavior is further proof of how easy it is for a complete stranger to act so ugly while claiming spiritual enlightenment. report abuse
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written by wasblind , February 28, 2010 GOD Bless the kavelins and all thier family report abuse
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written by wasblind , February 28, 2010 with all my heart i wish for nothing but the best for the kavelin family and thanks for your story it gives inspiration to many report abuse
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 written by D. Chapman, M.A. , March 04, 2010 To JW by Nature: "Stupid is as stupid does, my momma always said." ~ Forrest Gump Your lack of discernment and compassion are expected... Consider yourself dismissed from this discussion. To the Kavelins: Thank you for your account and the hope it gives others. May God continue to bless and keep you! report abuse
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 written by tina , March 07, 2010 Frank...your story is so heart warming. I hope this happens to my best friend from high school(class of '71). My best friend from high school became a JW. I have missed her so much all these years. We met for lunch last year. I think she agreed because she probably wondered if I was open to being a JW. I guess when she found out I wasn't open, she went back to shunning me. To Gwen...Love Ya Girl...you'll always be my best bud from high school. I love you undconditionally no matter how much you shun me. I wasn't even allowed to be in your wedding party. The little hall you got married in was so full of JW's that I didn't get to see the marriage ceremony. I stood outside during the whole thing. I pray for you often and hope that the true Holy Spirit will open you and your husband's eyes and realize the real "truth". I'll never stop praying for you. report abuse
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 written by Happily Free , March 10, 2010 To Frank and Barbara Kavelin: GOD BLESS YOU!!!! I so wish I could talk with you, but don't have a clue of how to do so, and the e-mail addresses appear to be somehow skewed. My story of freedome is amazing, and it's so liberating to simply have life back AND a relationship with God through Jesus Christ! No more lies, depression, hurt, control ... Oh I praise God for testimonies such as yours ... and mine! God Bless you Both, and if there's a way to contact you, please let me know what that is. report abuse
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written by wasblind , March 11, 2010 dear jw by nature are you not breaking the rules of the governing body by being on this site? How faithful can you be breaking the rules! naughty naughty!!!!! report abuse
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 written by v , March 12, 2010 wow satan has really gotten into you peoples heads, the end is closer than ever now and hes working as hard as he can, and you know what hes doing a pretty good job at it, now i know why they tell us not to come to these sites, very heartbreaking to see how many people are not going to make it... report abuse
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 written by alex , March 14, 2010 Satan is a very powerful enough especially on the days of the end. Better to stay with an organization that still truthworthly with GOD rather than self-controlling. Please go back where you were and be very patient... report abuse
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written by Mark Hunter , March 14, 2010 It always amazes me how much fear of Satan Jehovah's Witnesses have and how they believe their ogranisation is needed for salvation. Do you actually ever just read the Bible on it's own and let God speak to you through it? I'd love a Jehovah's Witness to explain to me biblically why we need an organisation for salvation. Please. One of the many Jehovah's Witnesses who visit this website telling us to return to the Watch Tower Society; show me from the Bible why I'm going to die at Jehovah's hands for not being part of your organisation and why I'm wrong for believing that Christ alone is sufficient for salvation. report abuse
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written by Happily Free , March 15, 2010 To Mark Hunter: You are SO right! God's vehicle for salvation is what HE instituted - Christianity, through Jesus Christ. God does not need a man-made organization with man-made flaws and agendas to speak for Him or to bless honest-hearted people. The JW's are in perilous danger, and so many of them are blinded to the point where they will defend this false religious-teaching cult all the way to their destruction. No matter what some of these people hear and read, they are so indoctrinated in false teaching that they can not see the light. Some have said that they see why the JW leaders and top dogs, who falsely and blasphemously use the title Faithful and Discreet Slave, tell them not to come to sites such as this. Yes, and we see and know why they tell you that too. They have confused you so much with their magazines and literature, and put fear into you of really being responsible to God and accountable for serving and worshipping Him in a way that He approves. They have you hoodwinked into doing things the wrong way - into believing the lie that they falsely term "The Truth." The real truth is that a great deal of blood will be on the hands of those 9 or so men, and on all those who have perverted and distorted who God truly is within the JW organization. God did not select JW's ... He instituted Christiantity and sent His Son, the Christ, to die for all of mankind. So even though Jesus died even for JW's, they still misuse and misrepresent the God of love, grace, and mercy. Though God desires that all will be saved, please know that there are many who won't be because of their allegiance to a group or an organization, versus their devotion and love for God! report abuse
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written by Mark Hunter , March 15, 2010 Anything that comes between us and God, whether man, image or organisation is an idol. report abuse
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 written by gildo , March 17, 2010 @Frank & Barbara: if JWs are not the people God uses who fulfilled Mt 24:14? Who spreads God's name, Jehovah, over all the earth? Have you thought about this in your personal researches? report abuse
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written by Mark Hunter , March 17, 2010 @ gildo Please define "Good news" per Matthew 24:14. Please provide supporting evidence that YHWH or Jehovah was used by the 1st Century followers of Jesus. Once we've established these issues then we can discuss who is fulfilling the preaching of the good news and the name that should be used to do so. report abuse
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 written by Tony , March 18, 2010 why do you all stick to the Bible and quote from it ..when deception has been going on all through the centuries..the Bible could be a big deception.you get out of the jw's but you can't break from believing the Bible.do you just need something to believe in ? I hav'nt got any answers ..but I would REALLY like to know.but nobody knows.I want proof of anything I'm going to believe in.The Bible is just a book made by men, as is the JW organization.But I would'nt know..nobody tells me anything.God seems to be keeping me and everyone else on this earth in the dark report abuse
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I was appointed as an elder in 1975 at the age of 24 and served as such for 26 years. My wife sacrificed more than the congregation could ever appreciate as I gave more time and energy to the congregation than to her and our children. I sincerely wanted to be a force for good in the congregation and worked hard toward that end. Barbara supported me in this, but naturally, at times, it put a strain on our marriage. When our disfellowshipped daughter was married in a civil ceremony held in her backyard, we were in attendance. Gossip about this circulated and our former congregation contacted the Society with their concerns. Our current congregation supported us and there was quite a bit of back and forth with the Service Department over this. The result was that I was removed as an elder. This moved Barbara to write the Society about their draconian policy regarding disfellowshipped family members. The form letter she received in return did nothing to comfort her. It served to reinforce what I had already observed as an elder, that nobody can reason with or question the current polices of the Governing Body.
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