Articles 
| How I helped my Family Leave Jehovah's Witnesses |
| Written by Anonymous |
| Monday, 16 March 2009 08:47 |
Foreword: The following account is provided in the interest of those who face the dilemma of wanting to leave the organization of Jehovah’s Witnesses known as the Watch Tower Bible & Tract Society. I was involved with the organization for nearly 27 years from December 1968 through July 1995. I was active for a total of 25 years. I served in various congregational positions including Elder. In my active evangelizing for the Watch Tower Society I helped a total of 15 people become Jehovah’s Witnesses including my four children. Introduction: In January 1992, before I actually ceased meeting attendance and started the healing process of unlearning thought patterns typical of Jehovah’s Witnesses, I had reached my decision to do something with my family. Having read the book, Crisis of Conscience by Raymond Franz in the spring of 1989, I had many of my own concerns about the organization verified. What he wrote was right on the money. I wrote to him and we exchanged some correspondence. I have only a few disagreements about some of the things he said, but they are too minor, and I no longer recall exactly what they were. I stayed with the Watch Tower organization for three more years for two reasons. After reading Crisis of Conscience I could not see where else to go, and my family were all active Jehovah’s Witnesses. I did not want to rock their world unless and until I could see a better way for myself. In November 1991, just after attending Kingdom Ministry School for Elders and Ministerial Servants at Woodburn, Oregon Assembly Hall, I read In Search of Christian Freedom by Raymond Franz. This book helped me to see an important application of scripture that led to my final decision to leave Jehovah’s Witnesses. In the book, In Search of Christian Freedom, Ray made an interesting application of Hebrews 13:13 about going outside the visible security of a camp or city to be with Christ. He likened this to modern day visible organizations and the visible security they offer. It was at that moment my earlier Christian training and view of life came into focus as to what was wrong with "organized" Christian religion. Upon that realization, I completely made a paradigm shift in all my concepts about Christianity and moved from any organizational focus to focus only on Jesus Christ. From that point forward, the Bible seemed like a new book, Christianity seemed like a whole new faith, and my association with any organized religion was totally and forever changed. How I got my family out: The question then facing many of Jehovah’s Witnesses who considering leaving association with the Watch Tower Society is: What do I do with my family? If I march into the house and tell them that the Watch Tower Society is a bunch of bunk, they could all react with standard JW training and shun me. I too faced this exact issue, and pondered what I needed to do deal with it. So, I took time to assess how I could get information to them so they could make their own choice. These are the basic principles I decided to employ and stick with no matter what: 1. I would get information to them to make a choice before I was ready to formally leave. Given these general principles, I then formulated a plan to discuss information with my family in such a way so as not to impose anything on them. I had to allow them to do their own thinking, and arrive at their own conclusions. But, at least they would have something that I did not have 25 years earlier ... Informed Consent! Our family studies were on Monday night where we engaged in a number activities, such as preparation for the Watchtower Study, the Book Study, and the Service Meeting. In January 1992, I opened up our family study something like this: ‘Okay family, I have an idea I want to put before you and see what you think.’ They all listened nicely. I said, it would be good if we could take a new course for a while and discuss something that especially ‘you children are going to face’ as you get older. I told them that as they mature in their Christian faith, they will encounter people at the door, on the job, and even at the Kingdom Hall who will say and do things that will challenge their faith. I told them, “You need to know for sure how to answer them; and for this to happen, you need to be resolved in your own hearts as to what you think. So, let's start off 1992 by discussing some real challenges and how to address them.” The reaction was overwhelmingly positive. It seemed a lot more interesting to them than our routine Watchtower Studies. We began by my asking a question about the Watch Tower’s 1914 prediction and how they could answer that. They had trouble at first, so I walked them through the answer using the Society's literature, both older and newer publications. After we went through this issue, I asked other questions, and they took off researching and trying to answer. They did not know that I was using both of Ray Franz's books and a lot of other personal research and source references to develop my questions and comments. And the questions were tough, thought provoking, and not easy to solve. But I never took a stand during this process! My goal here was to never make conclusions for them. Rather, walk them through the material slowly and look at all sides and allow them to make a conclusion for themselves. I made no judgments, and did not make negative remarks about the congregation, the Watch Tower Society, or its Governing Body. We continued meeting attendance, field service and all the other related activities. Eventually, I did begin to move in the direction of more fun family outings and I let service and meetings slip a little at first and more as time went on. I asked questions and then listened. I asked more questions and listened even more. I asked more and listened even more. Questions and listening are principle keys to this effort. Over and over I repeated this process, and never gave up. During this family process, coincidentally, an Elder took it upon himself to force an opinion upon my children without my consent or knowledge. One of my children attended home study and the rest went to public school. But he was trying to get my one child to request public school. I confronted him and learned that some were objecting to my daughter being home schooled and it was 'stumbling' some in the congregation. What really happened upon further investigation is that he did not like it that some families had children in home study and was trying to get them to change to public school. These so-called plaintiffs said, 'Well Brother ‘so-and-so’ has a daughter in Home Study and he is not only a servant but he is one of the Anointed! This angered the Elder and he made it his personal mission to undermine my authority with my children. This event troubled my children because we had always followed the standard that the Dad was the authority of the family and that the Congregation Elders must go through the Dad to suggest adjustments. So our family study became even more enlivened. They were all prepared for the first time I could remember. They all engaged in the study with enthusiasm. They felt a sense of freedom to open up and discuss touchy subjects. I created the environment of freedom to allow them a safe place to talk about anything and never be criticized. I gave them what I had given myself in reading x-JW literature: freedom to think, speak, and have their views and opinions valued. As time went by I had many occasions to take one or the other family member out for a cup of coffee, hamburger, or pizza, or run errands. During this time I would solicit their comments on the family study and ask if there was anything they wanted to discuss that we were not covering or that they felt required even more privacy. I said that nothing they discuss with me would be told to the Elders or anyone they don't want to know about their comments. Again, this safety net made it possible for them to open up more and more. Wow! Did that offer produce an avalanche of response! My oldest daughter for example, expressed concern that the Society seems to constantly pat itself on the back for everything it does, and they seem almost proud and arrogant. She said this disturbed her in light of the fact that the Watch Tower Society always demands modesty and humility from the membership. I did not jump on this and say, 'Wow kid, you are right, let's leave the organization now!' Rather, I said that I really appreciated her observation and never thought of it that way before. I told her that she made a good point that I am not sure how I could refute it. I then let her move on to other concerns because with some modest acknowledgment, she felt free to say more about what she was thinking. That is a key here ... listen to what your family is thinking. This process takes time. It takes time and gentleness to allow them a safe place to think for themselves. You and I cannot think for them. If we try to, we will lose them to the Watch Tower organization or the world in general. As April 1992 approached, I was assigned to give the Memorial talk because of my position and mostly because I am of the Anointed. This, too, caused some consternation with the same Elder. The Elder had been assigned the talk, but the Circuit Overseer made it clear that I was to give it since I am a qualified speaker and of the Anointed, and much longer in the truth than the jealous Elder. It was made so. But this Elder proceeded to put me through hell at every turn in making the arrangements for the Memorial. This was so much the case that it caused the whole Elder body to have a few meetings over it and led to contacting the Society. We eventually compromised. In reality we did things the other Elder wanted and I retained the ‘privilege’ of giving the Memorial Talk. My family saw all this and with the open thinking in the household, they could see the difference. So in getting your family out of the Watch Tower organization you can take advantage of events that occur. I do not mean to politically capitalize on events, and never create an event, but instead if an event takes place, involve your family's opinion and allow them to see all sides and watch what otherwise might be kept in confidence from them. It will amaze you to see how your family will rally around you if you let them in on matters and seek their guidance and opinion. After the Memorial talk, I resigned my position, and ceased going to meetings. I did this rather abruptly, and I wish I had taken it more slowly. This was my one blunder. I had wanted to make a slower transition, but I could not stand it anymore, and just told the Presiding Overseer that I needed time off. I did continue to take my family to meetings and assemblies. Coincidentally, in May 1992 we had a Circuit Assembly at Woodburn, Oregon. I took the children and then went off by myself to the beach at Lincoln City. There I sipped some Scotch and thought a lot about my whole life and what was about to take place, and where I would go from here. My wife stayed home as usual with her depression. At that Circuit Assembly the Elders learned of another new "loving" provision from the Faithful and Discreet Slave: that Elders and Ministerial Servants who need to reduce or even stop activity could remain as Elders or Ministerial Servants with a majority vote of the Body of Elders. This was offered to offset the decline in Elders and Ministerial Servants from those who were resigning. The idea is that when the Elder or Ministerial Servant was ready, he could resume duties without the long waiting period of being 're-qualified'. Our congregation Elders voted unanimously to refuse my resignation and keep me in holding. I allowed that to stand so I could divert attention from my resignation to continue helping my family. By June 1992, I took a business trip to Alabama. While there I went to Georgia on the weekend to visit with Ray and Cynthia Franz. We talked at great length about everything from the Trinity, the Bible, and the Watch Tower Society to what to do with the rest of our lives. Upon my return from that visit, I made final plans to tell my family what took place and where I stood. I took each one aside and privately told them that for about seven months we have as a family discussed many concerns about the Watch Tower Society, the Bible, God, religion, why I became one of Jehovah’s Witnesses and so forth. I told each one something like this: ‘You know that I love you unconditionally. I made a serious decision to reject my Catholic religion to become one of Jehovah’s Witnesses. I did this at risk of losing my family then for what I considered greater principles at stake. Now, that we have considered each of our concerns, some mutual, and some exclusive, I have to make another serious decision. It is time to move beyond words and take action. If you do not agree with what I am about to say, please do not go to the Elders, as I will simply send in a letter of Disassociation and head it off at the pass. But I no longer consider myself one of Jehovah's Witnesses and cannot in good conscience continue association with the Watch Tower Bible & Tract Society. I place my faith in Jesus Christ alone as my savior. ‘Now, you can choose to shun me, or take this window of time to reevaluate the organization for yourself, and then make your own personal decision. I will respect and support whatever decision you make. I love you unconditionally and that will never change.’ To my great pleasure, each and every one of them took the window of time to make their own assessment. Why was this so effective? Because one path offered by the Society means NO thought and no freedom but only reaction and loyalty to the Watch Tower organization. No time is allowed to assess matters. Loyalty and obedience to the organization are already in place and no room is permitted to think otherwise. On the other hand, I offered them time, safety, freedom to talk openly, value of their opinion, think for themselves, and no pressure, and no fear from me, and most of all my unconditional love. Which would you choose? The human spirit needs the essential components of freedom, self-thought, self-esteem, love, a safe environment, openness, discussion, information, and exchange of ideas. What I gave my family is priceless but without cost. Anyone can do it if you slow down your eagerness to leave the Watch Tower organization and work with your family. Consider each of their individual needs, personalities, and most of all respect them. I hope this works for you as well as it did for me. Your fellow friend in following Jesus Christ. (anonymous) more specific followup to this article (entitled, "Case Example of Talking to My Family") Hits: 4372 Trackback(0)
Comments (37)
  written by May2 , June 30, 2009 I read your posting, and the amount of hope that it has given me is tremendous. I should start off, that I am not a Jehovah's Witness. I am Catholic. My boyfriend is however, and the amount of emotional turmoil and strain his religion has taken on us is immense. We are on the verge of breaking up. I have never tried to push my views on him, I have encouraged, (albeit erroneously) him to practice his religion, although just about all of his friends have cut us off. I am terrified to broach the idea of a religious discussion with him, so far he gets angry and unreasonable if we try to talk religion. I went so far as to begin studies in his religion for about 2 weeks, before I realized I cannot conform to their misleadings. My dilemma is this; how can I aid him in leaving? He will not talk religion with me now, making it even more difficult. I do love him, we've been together a good amount of time, how can I help him to leave before this organization destroys our relationship? report abuse
vote down
vote up
Votes: +1
 written by Trying to Get out.... , July 02, 2009 I'm am very touched by your story. I am going through this EXACT situation as we speak. I have so many questions for you and would love to know if you could contact me so we can talk. My biggest pondering questions are: If I leave the organization, where do I go from there?? What meaning is there to my life after the WTS?? What am I if I'm not one of JW's?? If organized religon is corrupt, then do I just worship Jesus on my own? How? Did not the scriptures say "do not forsake the gathering of yourselves together.."?? Doesn't that mean we should go to church somewhere to worship him? If I don't have a religion, then where do I worship him?? What about preaching? Doesn't the scriptures say to "go therfore and make disciples..."??? If I don't go door to door, how then am I to preach like Jesus did?? As you can see, I NEED ANSWERS! And I'm not finding these answers anywhere. I have done my research. I know that the WTS is wrong, but what next? Ok I leave them....but then what?? Any help is GREATLY appreciated!!! report abuse
vote down
vote up
Votes: +4
 written by I've been out but looking for something , July 03, 2009 I am very glad I came across this. I wish I had answers for you "trying to get out" I have been an ex-jehovah witness for around 15 years. I just wrote a letter stating I no longer wanted to be a Jehovah's Witness. It has been a struggle not knowing what to do or where to go. Obviously I made it through. Its been really hard because I have felt very guilty about considering other faiths and what other people think. I just know I want to know what is right. But my conscious makes me feel like I am doing something wrong. I just recently started looking up information on the history of Jehovah's witnesses and found some interesting facts. Even still I feel guilty to think that the "Truth" is wrong or bad. Its extremely hard to grasp even though my mind tells me that it is. I can't help feeling like an apostate. I can understand the logic that we should be able to look at all the information even if its from another religion or that we should be able to voice our thoughts, but if feels so wrong for me. I have been unreligious since I have left. I have looked into other spiritual venues, but I just never feel whole. My entire family was raised Jehovah Witness and my dad and one of my sisters still are. I celebrate the holidays and everything for many years now. It took many years for me even to think about it. After leaving I shunned the thought of celebrating anything. I refused even when I had my son. I had many fights with my husband over celebrations. Now I celebrate everything and I am scared for my dad to find out. By the way I am 36 years old. Anyway, I feel that I want to have God in my life, but I don't know how to do it. I don't know where to go. I've thought about attending a new age church, where you can just go in your jeans if you wanted to. But I never did get up the guts to go. I got to the point that I was just so sickened to think of going to another meeting, to wear clothes I never would wear, or have to study and prepare or even a book study makes me cringe. I can't stand to think of it. I've prayed to God asking for guidance on what to do. But I still don't know. What bible do I use. How will I understand it? Its so complicated for me to interpret. And now, if I read the passages I remember I will interpret them the way I was taught. report abuse
vote down
vote up
Votes: +2
written by Trying to Get Out , July 05, 2009 Hi "I've been out but looking", I can truely tell you that I completely understand what you are going through as I myself are to as well. I am 37, married 18 years, and have 2 young children. It's silly when I think about how even as my age...at this point in my life...having a family of my own , that I (...and you it seems) still seem to worry about what our parents think of us. Yes, we love our parents....most children do. And it's our instinct to want to please them. However, I can't help but wonder WHY at this stage in our lives we still seek to live the way our parents want us too instead of taking charge of our own lives and families and living them the way WE want too. It's funny, because most of our parents aren't living their lives the way THEIR parents raised them. So why are we any different? Why do we feel so guilty and so obligated? Most of my extended and immeadiate family are witnesses. We face a huge loss of family on my husbands side even if we are not DF'd. If we so much as become "inactive" they will indeed shun us. My side of the family is half witnesses and half not, so we will have some family to associate with. But , it's the pain I know it will cause my parents when they find out. So , in that respect I see where you are coming from. By the way, do not feel as if you are being apostate. My view on that is this.....the definition of an apostate is someone who abandons their faith or religion. If that is so, then are all the people leaving their faith/religion and becoming JW's apostates? I don't feel that apostate is technically a bad thing then in that respect. Anyone who changes religious faiths is considered an apostate by their previous faith. My other point is this.....If the JW's have the "Truth" as they say they do and then they are God's mouthpiece, then the "Truth" should be able to stand on it's own. Reading any other literature or investigating the history of the JW's or studying about a particular belief should be welcomed.....I mean , if they have the "truth" then they should have nothing to worry about. If it's the "truth" then nothing written or spoken should be able to disprove it. It (the truth) should be able to stand on it's own. The things I've discovered are not subjects that are debatable by each persons opinion.....the information I've found out is actual FACT. That is what has helped me....knowing that it's FACT and not speculation or opinions of others. As to attending other churches.....I say that paying attention to the scriptures is top priority when you are faced with "what to do without the JW's". The scriptures say that you "should not forsake the gathering of yourselves together". In that light, you should simply find the church that you feel brings the most honor to God in their teachings and attend that. God wants us to worship him. What I've found in my research on this subject is that Gods love us all. If you feel in your heart of hearts that what you are doing to worship him properly is the right course, Jehovah will see that, he reads your heart. The problem I have with choosing to go to the Kingdom hall to worship him is that the Watchtower Society has total and absolute control over it's congregations to the point that you no longer have a choice on how to worship God. They set the rules and require you to follow them without question. With them, your worship to God no longer comes from your own heart and will to do so, but rather it comes from a act of obedience to an earthly organization (something the scriptures WARN us not to do). I hope this helps. report abuse
vote down
vote up
Votes: +5
 written by marco , July 11, 2009 estaS ENFERMO Y VOS Sabes lo que espera, perdiste tu oportunidad. report abuse
vote down
vote up
Votes: -2
 written by marco , July 11, 2009 Estas enfermo, y lo mas triste es que sabes lo que te espera, perdiste tu ooportunidad y no solo eso sino q addemas ahora estas pecando contra el espiritu santo de jehova. Sobre tu cabeza hay mucha sangre inocente y sabes que te la van a cobrar report abuse
vote down
vote up
Votes: -3
 written by Vicky , July 13, 2009 Hello, I'm an ex JW. I was raised as one and was baptised at the age of 14. By the time I was 27, I had seriously been questioning a lot of my believes as a JW. I remember when I broke the news to my best friend/cousin that I was going to be disfellowshipped. She said "If we don't have the organization, What else do we have, where would we go?" I was never afraid, I was just happy that I would be free to finally think for myself. It takes time to deprogram your mind. You all need to hang in there and be patient with yourselves and enjoy this new opportunity you have to found what's true for yourself. I found that books such as "The Power Of Now", "A New Heaven And A New Earth", by Ekhart Tolle and "Your Sacred Self" by Wayne Dyer, helped me greatly in a time where I was lost spiritualy. I've never felt more spiritual and at peace in my whole life. Hang in there and enjoy the new horizon. You are now free to think and believe whatever feels good to your consciousness, the true you. report abuse
vote down
vote up
Votes: +1
 written by Crissie , August 06, 2009 I am married to a JW - he was raised as one. I find the controlling influence of the governing body extremely difficult to deal with. I am a Christian, but also find that when we try to discuss matters of religion, it ends up in a fight most of the time as he is so set in his thinking (and I probably get too emotional). Any advise on what approach to follow to create meaningful conversation and make him investigate some of their teachings more objectively? I am really scared that this will eventually lead to our marriage breaking up and I love this man with all my heart. report abuse
vote down
vote up
Votes: +0
 written by Leah , September 22, 2009 I am so touched by the above stories: I was born and raised a JW, I am 43 and still afraid to speak up. My family goes way back in the "truth" both sets of grandparents were faithful to the end. I even have a uncle who was a district overseer for years, who just retired. There is also family on my husbands side who are JWs, the point I'm making is how do I speak up without losing everyone? I have never felt right about the "truth" for as long as I can remember. I hate the emotional control they have over you, I tried to confide to an elder on a shepherding call once that I was having doubts, and felt like the "truth" wasn't in my heart. He actually told me maybe I needed to be on antidepressants! He said over half the congregation is on medication, so maybe that's what I need. whoa! what does that tell you! My husband was an elder a few years back, but we moved to another state and he applied for a correctional job at a prison where he would have to carry a gun. He got the job, which we sorely needed, and we were black balled for that! He will still go once in a while to the meetings and he still believes it is the "truth". He just goes along and doesn't think about it, well, I can't. I can't live being a hyprocrite, I really don't know who I am though, I feel I don't really have a identity. I started doing some research outside the watchtower publications, (big no no) and actually got some answers. Now I guess I need to take a big step and investigate other religions, I just feel so turned off by religion now. Whats hard too, is not having anyone to talk to about this, I've gone to therapy but I wish I had a support group or someone to confide in. I guess thats why I'm writing this, that if someone else is in the same situation that I'm in, or feels the same as I do, just realize your not alone. It's scary to think on your own after being taught all you life not to speak up, but it can be done, it's a long process, be patient I'm trying to be! Leah report abuse
vote down
vote up
Votes: +3
 written by Lynn , October 14, 2009 The JW organization stole my youth. I reg pio while still in High School and holding down a part time job. I spent weekends at quickbuilds and vacations at assemblies. They told me that people in the world were bad and would never be there for me like the congregation. The people outside that Organization are so much nicer than the ones in it. I drifted away and it was years before I could let myself open up to people on the outside. Now my life is truely blessed I have friends who love me unconditionaly. There is a great deal of life and joy on the outside. I started vollunteering in my community and through that meet many who have helped me change my life. I have a joy now that I was taught only the JWs could provide. Ask and you shall recieve. This only worked for me after I made up my minde to leave. Lynn report abuse
vote down
vote up
Votes: +2
 written by Kitty Scott , October 21, 2009 I would love to read more stories of how to get your family out of this organisation. Do you know if anyone has written a book? Perhaps a collection of stories like yours. You make a good point in saying "My goal here was to never make conclusions for them." We are always told to "make the truth your own". My son has expressed concern recently. I could have poured my heart out to him about all the lies I know about, but instead I told him that he would have to do some research and that what ever he found I would be there for him and I promised that I would never tell another soul. I assured him that nothing in this world would ever make me stop associating with him. I also hinted that he's not alone in his doubts but that others have the same concerns. I just waiting for him to start his research and when he hits that brick wall of realization he knows that he can come to me. My problem is I have four more adult children all married in the organisation. It's going to be a long hard road and it may tear us apart but I'm going to take my time. report abuse
vote down
vote up
Votes: +0
 written by Victor F , November 16, 2009 I am very happy for you. It seems that you made the correct decision in the approach you did. I too was in the organization for about 30-years, but when I pulled out I jsut dropped a bomb on my wife. I guess different things work for different situations and different people. Because, unbeknownst to me, my wife had been thinking along the same lines as me and agreed to pull out of organized religion with me. We have ZERO regrets. "It is for freedom that Christ has set us free. Stand firm, then, and do not let yourselves be burdened again by a yoke of SLAVERY." - Galations 5:1 report abuse
vote down
vote up
Votes: +1
written by Victor F , November 16, 2009 Para MARCOS (for Marcos): Estas muy equivocado amigo! Sobre la cabeza de la organizacion Watchtower hay mucha sangre inocente... report abuse
vote down
vote up
Votes: +3
 written by Jay , November 18, 2009 Hi, All I have been inactive for almost a year now. I left after I couldn't take the elders hunting me like an animal anymore. I'm reading a book on spiritual abuse, and, except for the tithing issue the book describes, everything fits the WT Society to the tee. The book is written with churches in general in mind. It is not easy to be where I am. It is, however, the price one pays for truth. In an abusive religion the one pointing out the problem becomes the problem... I was baptised when I was 18. M/s after 2 years. Have been serving for 6 years. I'm 28 now. Spoke several languages and could read Greek and Arabic. This made me THE target for incompetent envious elders. I'm receiving therapy for the emotional abuse. If anyone is interested to drop me a mail, feel free to do so. We need each other's support. Hope to hear of you soon, Jay This e-mail address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it report abuse
vote down
vote up
Votes: +1
 written by Vernon Moore , November 18, 2009 What was the prediction trhat you spoke of, I have a vey close friend that is a witness, I do agree with some of the world events, but I am living for Christ and well rooted, also some of the current events do coincide with the bible espeaciallyin rev. report abuse
vote down
vote up
Votes: +0
 written by Victor Benitez , November 19, 2009 To Marco, You should re-think what you say. A fanatic or extremist point of view leads one to say things that are completely without basis; leading one to say error in thought and in words. Necesitas pensar mucho mas lo que dices. El ser un fanatico o extremista en tu punto de vista te permite decir cosas que no tiene base; que llegas a decir cosas erroneas en pensamiento y en palabra. Victor B. report abuse
vote down
vote up
Votes: +2
written by Victor Benitez , November 19, 2009 To anonymous, Thank you for sharing your experience. Your words are very helpful to me, and I'm sure, to many who look forward in seeing their families, one day, leave the Watchtower cult, for good. Best wishes, Victor B report abuse
vote down
vote up
Votes: +0
 written by Josh , November 19, 2009 I sincerely enjoyed the stories and comments above, In hopes of not writting a book here I'll say that its obvious we all are left with a very empty feeling, its fantastic to have this forum for support, I do know that Im so willing to share my experience with any one willing to listen and in turn share with them the fact theres plenty of hope, love, and peace on the outside of the organization, and yes I was raised a JW and my entire family with the exception of my little brother, they are all still active in the organization. If anyone cares to, or feels the need to talk with someone who completley understands, please dont hesitate to send a message. report abuse
vote down
vote up
Votes: +0
 written by Karen , November 20, 2009 Hi, I know how difficult it is when first leaving the Jehovah's Witnesses 'religion'. It's so easy to feel lost, though relieved at the same time to be out of that cult. Over time (I disassociated from the Witnesses over 20 years ago) I have come to feel a great sense of peace and serenity. I don't belong to a church, don't feel the need to, not anymore. I believe in God with my whole heart and soul and I am so grateful that He gave His only begotten Son to save mankind. Right now that is enough for me. That is not to say that if I find a church that I like I won't become a part of it. But, it is faith that is important to me. I don't want to become involved in a any kind of religion that has rules, regulations, and ideas of 'works' being shoved down the congregations' throats. I have great faith in God, in Jesus, and I find that very fulfilling. However, I know that we are all different and unique indivduals, and what one person finds rewarding and fulfilling in his/her life might not feel compatible to others. Sometimes when feeling kind of lost and not knowing 'where to go' after no longer being a Jehovah's Witness, it helps to take time to just be. So, that is the suggestion, the advice I would like to give right now. Just be, and enjoy every minute of it. You can have communion with God without being in a church. Besides, the Bible says when "two or three' are gathered in His name, God is with them. report abuse
vote down
vote up
Votes: +2
 written by anony mouse , January 03, 2010 i want out so bad at times and then other times i am happy. i can not take this emotional turmoil anymore. i think about what this life would mean for my daughter and i realize i would basically deny her her childhood for this, and thats not fair. my husband and i argue at times and i know he feels like me. he says he doesnt mind the study and attending a meeting once in awhile, and then other times he says he wants nothing more to do with them. I have lost almost everyone from life before and i know leaving will cost me friends from now, but yet then again none of them are banging down the door to be friends anymore. in the beginning they are so nice and all over you day and night and once you become even an unbaptized publisher you kinda die off or something. but where i live i am constantly told i am a rarity because i am the first person to come into the congregation and do anything in almost 20 years. 20 years, that has to say something. i want to leave, i just dont know how. i am so lost, and alone. report abuse
vote down
vote up
Votes: +1
 written by Robert , January 11, 2010 You are never truly alone. As with most of you I was raised a JW I decided to listen to my concience and research those unanswered questions that plagued us all. It is very important to have a support system when deciding to leave. Immerse yourself in bible reading and prayer. One person said that the bible became like a new book to him and that you will find. You will discover Jesus Christ the real Jesus who loves you unconditionally. Salvation is a free gift and it is given to us individually no organisation required. However, Jesus did say where two or three are gathered in his name, there His spirit will be also therefore there is a need for association with like minded individuals who are worshipping in spirit and truth. Build a relationship with Christ first this must be the first objective spend time in prayer. Pray as the tax collector did in the parable. Ask for the Holy Spirit to come into your heart and teach you. Our God will not see your sincerity and reject you. report abuse
vote down
vote up
Votes: +0
 written by Liz , January 12, 2010 Well im studying with the jw for a little while know, and i think that ther the best thing that had ever happened to me... and All this people that use to be one are really going to regret this. report abuse
vote down
vote up
Votes: -3
written by Liz , January 12, 2010 All this people are going to regret this report abuse
vote down
vote up
Votes: -3
 written by Veronica , January 13, 2010 Well, have fun being brainwashed, Liz. You can't even give a good explanation and you're new, so what do you know? Oh yeah, make sure to ask them to teach you how to write. report abuse
vote down
vote up
Votes: +0
 written by Booker T. , January 13, 2010 I just love reading about someone that really was a dedicated JW's and left because it helps me realize that I really do love Jehovah and Jesus. Some of the JW's told me that I did not love Jehovah when I decided to leave JW's and for awhile I believed them. I thought that maybe I should have "waited on Jehovah" for answers to difficult questions and stay a JW's. But my conscious just would not let me. So reading these stories are truly appreciated and helpful to all of us that suffered with the "guilt" by the elders. One elder yelled at me and told me that I was going to regret my decision to "disassociate" myself. That was the best decision I could have made. I no longer allow men to tell me what to believe and how to worship. I read my bible and let Jehovah and Jesus tell me how. Organized religion is very "dangerous" and destructive. And I am talking about "all" of them not only JW's. Born-Again Christians are just as bad with their "fire" and brimstone scare tactics. report abuse
vote down
vote up
Votes: +2
 written by No More Knocking , January 19, 2010 I agree with Karen. You don't have to "go anywhere". Just be. As for me, after fading from the Watchtower, I immediately did volunteer work, joined the Red Hats and found friends that way. Since leaving the Watchtower religion about five years ago, I have never been happier. It seems I spent my life searching before and after the JW's and I have come to realize that there is nothing to find. You don't need to have "somewhere to go." I do realize I was lucky because I didn't lose my family - they faded away too. I can't imagine how awful it would be to be shunned by your own family. Such an evil, wicked self-serving doctrine. Actually, I don't have any use for any organized religion and I am content not going to any church. I don't believe any of them have "the truth." Someday it will be revealed but we don't need a church for that to happen. To those of you who leave, find something else to do - keep busy, make new friends. And you don't have to have a religion to be happy. report abuse
vote down
vote up
Votes: +0
 written by not brave enough to leave a name , January 24, 2010 Help! All of your postings are so helpful. I have been a Witness for 24 years, I have been a minesterial servant, elder, pioneer, I have gone through times of doubt now and then, but always convinced myself to hold on, it must be the truth ... there are so many things Wintesses teach that make sense, logical, things I WANT to hold on to, I tell myself that nobody is perfect, the Apostles made mistakes in the first century, why wouldn't we expect the Faithful Slave to error, its not like anybody is making money at headquarters, who else is preaching the Good News earth wide, who else uses God's name ... I am going CRAZY, I feel terrible and empty, I got choked up at the meeting today because I feel I have to leave, my wife could tell something was wrong, my mind wasn't there, I didn't comment at the Watchtower study. I just looked around at all of my friends that I will lose. I have been praying for guidance, specific direction, and I am almost certain my prayers are leading me to the hardest thing I will ever face. I love everyone at the Hall, they are all good people and good friends, my life as I know it will be over, my wife and three daughters are all Witnesses, my youngest wants to get baptized this year at the convention! I feel so lost. I love Jehovah and Jesus. I want to be a person of faith. I feel closer to Jesus than I ever have since I have been thinking about leaving. You are the only people in the world that know my thoughts. There is so much going on in my mind about this my head is killing me! If I just become inactive so I don't make waves, I won't lose my family, but I already feel so responisble for leading them down the wrong path, how can I not try to help them see that. If God's spirit is directing me away and I stay to keep my family together I feel like I will be unfaithful and not responding to the leading of God's spirit! Uggghhh! All the sriptures I have used to justify staying have taken on a new meaning! The division that Jesus warned about for families will apply in a whole new way for me! Please ... PRAY FOR ME! report abuse
vote down
vote up
Votes: +3
written by bob , January 24, 2010 Liz. The people at your hall are probably all great people. The message sounds great. Just examine everything. Be as informed as you possibly can before you get baptized because if you do have doubts later, well, you can tell by the other comments that it is very difficult to have questions on the other side of baptism. If you do get baptized, it won't be "in the name of the Father, the Son, and the Holy Spirit", it will be a baptism of dedication to the Watchtower Bible and Tract Society, Inc. ... seriously. report abuse
vote down
vote up
Votes: +0
 written by DaughteroftheKING , January 27, 2010 Dear "Trying to get Out", Yes, you can worship Jesus on your own! Start with the book of John. Pray and talk to Him. Tell Him you want Him in your heart as YOUR personal Lord and saviour. I attend a great church, because you are right, we are not supposed to forsake the fellowship. Calvary Chapels are awesome Bible teaching churches going the Bible only, no other books or literature, book by book, chapter by chapter, verse by verse. There are several ex JW's in my congregation. They are so set free...it's a great blessing to see them. We also go out on the streets to share the gospel and "make disciples". I love my congregation. Remember keep your eyes on Jesus, not on man. Let me know if you want to talk more. report abuse
vote down
vote up
Votes: +0
written by DaughteroftheKING , January 27, 2010 Dear Not Brave Enough, I will pray for you brother everday! Do what anonymous did to help your family. It was a good plan. It is, no doubt, God's spirit that is leading you out of there. Think about it, the WTS has to teach some logical things or else everyone would know right away that they were wrong. It's when teachers mix in bad info. with good, and logical info. is when they get you. Ask HIM for forgiveness about leading your family astray. He loves you and forgives you. You were deceived. Now stay in HIS word, not the Watchtower's, pray and keep praying for your family to be delivered. Be strong and don't give up. Check out www.4witness.org. There is alot of info. that can help you. Let HIM be your strength. Now you know the WTS is wrong, you have to continue on your path out. I will pray for you everyday, I promise. report abuse
vote down
vote up
Votes: +0
written by Messenger , January 27, 2010 Dear Liz, Please don't go further is studying with JW's. You are being deceived. Stop before you get incredibly hurt along with your family. Think about it. Jehovah does not make mistakes, how then could the WTS claim to be the only channel that Jehoval speaks through, as they have made too many mistakes to count? There is so much research you can do before you get in too deep. Read Crisis of Conscience by Raymond Franz, I beg you. What do would you have to lose by reading this book? I write this out of the deepest concern. 2 Corinthians 11:13-15 13 For such men are false apostles, deceitful workmen, masquerading as apostles of Christ. 14 And no wonder, for Satan himself masquerades as an angel of light. 15 It is not surprising, then, if his servants masquerade as servants of righteousness. Their end will be what their actions deserve. I will be praying for you. report abuse
vote down
vote up
Votes: +0
 written by Kathy , February 05, 2010 No se ni q. pensar sobre este tema. Lo unico q. yo se es q. creci en la organizacion y aunque no asisto; las ense~anzas me han ayudado en este mundo tan egoista a escoger las mejores opciones a segun se q. Jehova quiere; y les ense~o a mis hijas sobre Jehova; y no digo q. es perfecta la congregacion; yo pase situaciones bien malas como una expulcion a mis 12 a~os y no era bautizada; y con todo y eso; he pensado q. ese error; todos y cada uno de nosotros le vamos a rendir cuenta a Jehova; y lo dejos en sus manos y con todo y eso; se q. no hay religion q. se pueda comparar con la Organizacion de Jehova; Y eso lo digo yo q. llevo muchos a~os fuera de la congregacion por vagueria o no se porq. pero si se q. amo a Jehova con todo mi corazon y se diferenciar a Jehova de Jesus; creo q. tienes una confusion porq. por lo q. lei no mencionas a Jehova; parece q. quieres olviedar esa parte para no relacionarlo con el nombre de Testigos de Jehova; YO NO SOY QUIEN PARA JUZGAR; EN LA BIBLIA DICE Q. SI JUZGAS ASI MISMO JEHOVA TE JUZGARA; SOLO TE DIGO ORA MUCHO MUCHO MUCHO Y JEHOVA TE AYUDE; report abuse
vote down
vote up
Votes: +0
 written by Ashley , March 10, 2010 I have been dating a Jehovah's Witness for a long time and I am absolutley in love with him. Unfortunaltey, his faith/cult/religon is tearing us apart. He was born into this faith and is very active within it. He's only 19 and an only child and I know that it would break his heart to leave everything he has ever known but I know he can be so much happier if he leaves the WT. I am a Christian and want to help him find his way out of the Watchtower but I have no idea where to begin. Please contact me with any ideas @ \n This e-mail address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it '> This e-mail address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it . report abuse
vote down
vote up
Votes: +0
 written by pamela , March 12, 2010 Dear people....I fell away from the jws for 12yrs i was trying to go back ,but i can't believe everything they teach anymore and its a scary step and to find another place to go is hard.I found an internet radio station called HIS CHANNEL..through ITUNES AND WHEN I LISTENED TO THIS i thought they were making sense.and using the bible and they preach from Calvery Chapel. I really used to think the wts had the whole truth and to lose all that contact feels bad.I wrongly thought when i stopped associating God had left me and i didn;t think i had any hope so i turned very sinful,now i realise Jehovah is everywhere and he's bigger than any man made religion i hope he can forgive me GOD IS BIGGER THAN RELIGION and i know how painful it is to try to understand were you fit in ,Keep your eyes fixed on Jesus he's our KING love to you all,and please pray that God will forgive my rebelion bye report abuse
vote down
vote up
Votes: +0
 written by trini_servant , March 15, 2010 I am a JW in Trinidad & Tobago. Are they any Ex Jw's in the Caribbean or in Trinidad & Tobago. Please emai lme at \n This e-mail address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it '> This e-mail address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it report abuse
vote down
vote up
Votes: +0
 written by Yours truly. , March 16, 2010 Well, the original post says the organization of J.W. is false because of the faults of individual members. Plus it gives the idea that Jesus never required being part of any organized religion. If we follow that logic then we would have to reject the family group of Abraham and stay away from them because of the arguments between his servants and those of Lot. We would have to abandon the Israelites due to all the rebellion and bad attitudes among them in the desert and beyond. We would even have to stay away from the 12 apostles because one of them became a traitor and because Paul and Peter had arguments. Because Peter incorrectly treated those of the nations like excluded people not even eating with them until Paul corrected him. Yes, we can find faults with all the organized groups of God's followers in history. Would that have been faithful to abandon Abraham's family? Do abandon the Israelites due to their rebellion? To abandon Jesus apostles and not even meet or learn from them after Jesus death because of their mistakes? When there are people in Jehovah's organization who have faults, it's a test of our faith to stick with God's people, is it not? So will you be like King David who REFUSED to kill king Saul? Who even spoke to him politely and humbly because he was God's anointed servant? The question of who is God's organization has nothing to do with individuals faults or failings. It has to do with these simple questions and other like them? Who is accomplishing the preaching work in the "entire inhabited earth for a witness to all the nations"? First, how can anyone be sure that is accomplished without organization? Without being organized how will you know which countries, counties, islands have received a witness? In fact, there is only one organized group which has covered literally and systematically every nation, country and island with people who declare the good news about God's Kingdom. What other organization can accurately teach what God's Kingdom is and what it will do? The Apostles of Jesus also kept thinking that Jesus would come into his kingdom at their time. Is that a reason to reject them as not part of God's people. Mistakes are a part of life. Until you can honestly say you never make mistakes, you need to stop pointing out mistakes in others. Instead look at the facts of what all the organizations in the world have accomplished. What organization in the world prints literature in hundreds of languages about the Bible? Only one. None other. So who is really the faithful and discreet slave that the master has appointed over his belongings? Make the mistake of rejecting that slave and you have, in turn rejected Jesus who is the master himself and therefore his father God. Of course, it can be painful to be mistreated by others. Imagine the case of the one surviving priest when King Saul kill ALL the priests of Jehovah and only one escapes. That was all his male relatives. Brothers, uncles, father, cousins, and nephews. Was that a time to abandon the Israelites? to abandon God? Please wake up people before it's entirely too late for you. report abuse
vote down
vote up
Votes: +0
 written by Judy , March 17, 2010 I was raised a Catholic, then turned from that teaching to become one of Jehovah's Witnesses. I wanted to know the true God, who was he, and what did he want from humans, from me? How could I please him? I don't think most people really know him. After many years being a JW, I saw the faith as another big religeous business, one that must control its members and keep them in fear and convince them everyone else is the enemy. I did however learn to read the Bible, which I hadn't ever done as a Catholic. I was drawn by Jehovah to himself, and fell in love with him and his ways and dedicated my life to him forever. You don't need to be part of an organization for that to occur. Many JW's aren't in love with him, they operate on obligation and fear. I asked the elders if the organization was truly from God, how could there be theological errors? Even though the Jews made major mistakes, they had the true faith from God. It was human error, not theological errors. The elders were infuriated that I would question the Faithful and Discreet Slave. I felt betrayed. I struggled for years wondering where should I go from here? God is faithful, though. He is the one that calls a person and does not forget them. He gave us his Word. It is his communication with us down through the ages. I pray, read the Bible, witness when an opportunity presents itself, see wrong viewpoints from many faiths, including the JW's as well as mainstream Christians, and long for God's kingdom. They've got some things right on, some things dead wrong. The way you can tell is to know Gods word. Don't throw the baby out with the bathwater and get so frustrated you stop worshiping Jehovah!!! Be like the Bereans looking to the Scriptures to see if those things they heard were correct. Thanks for reading this long monolog! You are loved! report abuse
vote down
vote up
Votes: +0
Write comment
|
TrackBack URI for this entry
Subscribe to this comment's feed